PORTLAND, OR — In one of the most improbable costumes of the year, second-year Trail Blazers Center Greg Oden has dressed up as an NBA player for Halloween.
According to SSNN sources, the costume was a last minute concoction after a recent medical issue rendered Oden costume-less.
“See, recently Greg went in for surgery on his left knee,” said Blazers head coach Nate McMillan. “The problem was, in addition to the surgical repair of his knee, the surgeon removed the nagging bolts from Oden’s neck at the same time, thereby reducing his Halloween effectiveness.”
“I have gone as Frankenstein for each of the 47 years that I’ve been allowed to go trick-or-treating,” Oden said. “So I didn’t really know what to do this year. Then, it hit me … I’m really tall. What if I pretend I’m an NBA basketball player?!?”
Apparently, those who have seen Oden’s costume have said that it’s really a tremendous imitation of what an NBA player would look like.
“I heard from Deron [Williams] that there was this old dude walking around in the neighborhood trick-or-treating, looking like an NBA player,” said Carlos Boozer of the Utah Jazz. “The funny thing is, when I saw him, I was like, ‘Damn, he really does look like he’s almost an NBA player. It’s like, if he put on a little bit of weight, and maybe learned some offensive moves, and learned some defense, and was able to stay healthy, and compete athletically at a high level, then he really could be an NBA player. But, man, is he tall!”
Still, the NBA’s leading costume judge had not quite decided what he thought about Oden’s get-up.
“That is either a terrible Arvydas Sabonis costume,” said Shaquille O’Neal, “or a tremendous Terry Porter.”
