Round 1: Smitty vs. phunDamentalz

[Chutney]

<div align="center"><font size=""3"">Smitty vs. phunDamentalz</font></div>

The battle will require 3 verses from each competitor or it will last 48 hours (whichever happens first). Verses will have a maximum length of roughly 24 lines. At the end of the battle, the 4 judges and a popular vote will determine who advances into the 2nd round. Good Luck.

 

[phunDamentalz]

round one from P-H-U-N

wow SMITTY? that's wild, i cant believe i drew you
it's crazy that the road to victory travels through you!
but nah you're just a stepping stone on my way to greatness...
got you sweating at the free throw line wondering "WILL I MAKE THIS?"
you won the last time; i lacked effort in my approach
but now i'm wiping you out like an exterminator to a roach
cause I worked on my technique and that was recently displayed
i'm coming at you more concentrated than grapefruit Minute Maid
the summer was the regular season kid welcome to the PLAYOFFS
yo NTC get me a graphic of Lance Bass with his SHIRT OFF!
i see your favorite players are Mekka Dwight and Iggy
You should get ready to rock the tourney's first RAINBOW SIGGY
Your rhymes aint up to scratch son, mine are scratch-TASTIC
my s*it flows fibrous greens while your colon's coming SPASTIC!
my lines are so phat i treat em with CORTISLIM
making half these jbballers sport a PERMA-GRIN....

Permagrin:

1) a blissfully wide post-coital grin indicative of particularly satisfying sex. usually indicates a strong sense of emotional closeness with the partner responsible for said sex. permagrin derrived from sex can often last for an entire day. this phenomenon is primarily experienced by females, but under certain circumstances can be found in males for the same reason.

2) a blank, complacent smile experienced after smoking an especially copious ammount of marijuana. permagrin will often fade once the initial high tapers off a bit, and the smoker regains cognitive abilities.

3) the blank, starry eyed grin which acompanies the ingestion of psychedelics. this type of permagrin typically occurs while observing something particularly prone to producing hallucinations, such as a moving light or toy.

 

[Smitty]

Yep, it's your boy Big Smitty again//About to make Little Phun start cryin again
A stepping stone? Phun didn't you learn?//Sit down, time for me straighten you out like a perm
Number 1:

Stop frontin Phun, we know why you're lookin for a picture of Lance//It's the only reason you ever keep your hand your pants
Guess we know who's really sportin' a Perma-Grin all over their face//No wonder Phun's girl started disappearin' without even a trace..

Number 2:

If all you can say is Phat to spice up a bar//It's no wonder your skills end up over the par
Youse a lightweight in the game kid, I'm a heavyweight, pound for pound//My swagger is strong bro, and well...yours is just not PHUNDAMENTALLY sound

Number 3:

See what I did to you? I didn't even need to talk about heat in my rhyme//Either way you're left lookin' like a scrub in his prime
I'm like Fedor in the ring, givin' you scars//PUNCH you with a few LINES and kick a couple of bars

Number 4:

Oh my God, he can't focus, he's losin his touch//Got crippled by my word play, Phun needs a lyrical crutch
You're getting desperate talkin about Minute Maid juices and such//Obey your king and zip your lip peasent....you're talkin too much

Number 5:

Once again Smitty proves why he's better than Phun//I hit em with the floetry so he makes like the Reverand and Run
I didn't even go hard on you, I was just messin'//That completes today's Rapology lesson.

 

[phunDamentalz]

Your lines snap back like Bubble Yum to your face
While big Phun spits rivers of infinite grace
you call me generic cause i use the word "phat"?
then you drop "stop fronting"? now how fresh is that?

and no I ain't your boy and I don't recall crying
i'm whacking you in the balls with a Calloway 9 IRON
With your plexiglass raps kid you're not in my class
i'm taking you to school kid - where's your HALL PASS?

"a scrub in his prime" wow that was confused
WILL MY EGO RECOVER FROM SUCH A BIG BRUISE?
Even in the desert or in Florida State Park
You couldn't catch fire you're just a SPARK IN THE DARK

And that one, two three sh*t? man I can count
Ten seconds on the canvas kid - looks like YOU'RE OUT
You're Fedor in the ring? well okay, I'm Jack Johnson
Inspiring Miles Davis and leaving you out of OXYGEN....

 

[Smitty]

Callin' me a kid? Somethin wrong with you duke?//Must be distorted after fallin' from that lyrical juke(call me Bush)
Get it straight Phun, you're the Texan, i'm a Saint//I'm a monster in this game like Dwight in the paint
Phun is the type that hangs out with all of those pricks and whores//He should call me GZA with the way I slice him up with these Liquid Swords
I got plexigrass raps? Try again little brotha//Trash like that will earn you a trip to the dumpster little brotha
I won't even let it rain you, I'll start bringin the floods//Makin you look like a Crip vs an army of Bloods
Why are you still here? Just get out of my way//Before I leave you like Denzel at the end of Training Day
If you're Jack Johnson, then I'm the black Hannibal//Bite your freakin head off with these rhymes, I'm a Rap cannibal
You got your arse handed, face it you're done//Your chances are less likely than a Laker shakin hands with a Sun

 

[phunDamentalz]

Yo Smit I like the way you rhyme "brotha" with "brotha"?!
Your words are like hailstones man I'm ducking for cover!
I don't know how you create these dope lines
Your prodigious talent is EXPLODING MY MIND
If only I could bottle a small part of your wit
I'd be so FLY - everyone else would be SH*T
You do inspire me bro; give yourself credit
My rhyme career to you is forever INDEBTED

^eight hits of sarcasm in case you don't get it
pull out a WEBSTER you INTELLECTUAL MIDGET
like Nate Robinson all bark and no BITE
I'm Harvey K in this Reservoir DOGFIGHT
your flow is scattato and not in a good way
without metaphors you got NOTHING TO SAY
Locke NTC and Authentiq can see...
This thread's turned yellow from your LYRICAL PEE
Your raps leave virtual **** stains on the screen
I wipe the thread clean with my lyrics so LEAN
your words lack meaning thought wisdom and substance
I got ALL FOUR OF THOSE TRAITS IN ABUNDANCE
Like Raja to Kobe I'm taking you out with a CLOTHESLINE
Aint no mistakin kid the first round is MINE...

 

[Smitty]

Sarcasm? Ok, I'll give you that, those were feasible lines//But how many rappers do you see spit the word PEE in their rhymes?
How many times you gonna put a picture at the end of a verse?//Next we'll likely see a pic of Phun wearin' pink, holdin' a purse
You rhymes are shallow homie, no depth and no flair//At the rate you're going you'll need a wish and a prayer
I'm the type that's a box office hit, nobody's seein' me//You're the type that just goes straight to the D-V-D
Take a look judges, watch how I slay this chump quietly//Put the nail in the coffin, I'm a Menace II Society
By the way I'm not Nate, more like Alexander the Great//I'll chop you up and ship you away in a crate
My sick flow's absurd, the best you ever heard//I'd scoop up your girl, but she aint nothin' but a bird
The first round is mine Phun, go buy a lyrical rap kit//Take some notes..maybe you'll win the consolation bracket

 

[Smitty]

Alright Judges, get your vote on.

 

[Mamba]

Smitty, that last line was f'n sick.

 

[phunDamentalz]

<div class="quote_poster">TheBlackMamba Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">Smitty, that last line was f'n sick.</div>
it was okay but check out Gotskillz - he has the best verse of this tournament by FAR imo.

 

[NTC]

Comments: Wow, what a battle, I'd say best battle of the opening round so far.

phunDamentalz, you were too nice on Smitty, I thought he brought it alot harder than you did. I liked your punches though, you coupled a few of them with some nice play on words, but as I said, they were nothing crippling. Your flow was quite good, a couple of instances where I couldnt pick up on the flow, but overall, it was consistant. I also liked your creativity, you took the time to find out (maybe you knew about them before hand, I dont know) about some words that arent common practice in everyday life, and put them to good use. Well done.

<div class="quote_poster">Quoting phunDamentalz:</div><div class="quote_post">and no I ain't your boy and I don't recall crying
i'm whacking you in the balls with a Calloway 9 IRON</div>
<font size=""1"">*I'm a golfer

</font>

Smitty, very well done, argubally the best I've read so far in the tournament. Everything was good from you, not great, but good. I really liked your use of Wordplay, many times you had me like "Ooh!" with your punchlines, you've put together the best wordplay I've read in this tournament so far. I also liked how you switched up things a bit, you didnt just stick to the normal rhyming pattern, as shown with your "little brotha" lines (which is perfectly acceptable for anyone who thinks it was a cheap move) and I got more of a sense that I was listening to a live rapper through that.

<div class="quote_poster">Quoting Smitty:</div><div class="quote_post">Youse a lightweight in the game kid, I'm a heavyweight, pound for pound//My swagger is strong bro, and well...yours is just not PHUNDAMENTALLY sound</div>

Flow: Smitty
Wordplay: Smitty
Punchlines: Smitty
Creativity: phunDamentalz

Vote: Smitty

 

[44Thrilla]

I also thought this was a great battle. Both guys were solid and both seemed determined to rip the other to shreds. I can't really critique or knock either guys skills, I just gotta figure out who came out on top in the back and forth stuff that was the story of the battle.

After reading it through 3 or 4 times, I'm gonna give my vote to phundamentalz because I thought he did a better job of attacking his opponent and I thought he was much more creative. However, it was really close and I think a case could easily be made for either MC. Nice battle, guys.

 

[Mr. J]

Sorry to post in the thread, but who wins?

 

[B.e.]

We still need votes from Locke, and authentic

 

[Notorious]

<div class="quote_poster">MrJ Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">Sorry to post in the thread, but who wins?

</div>

The rest of the judges have to vote, its tie right now 1-1(Some mod, move this to Discussion or something else)

 

[Sex Panther]

This was a good battle, no frontin'. I gotta give it to Phundamentalz though.

Smitty came up with a better flow and the punches were nastier than the one you threw phundamentalz. However, i gotta say that Phundamentalz creativity blew Smitty's away, it's just that Phundz threw in a few fillers which weren't needed. There needs to be more substance. I suggest you fix up the wordplay, you should go deep in this tourney if you got better. Smitty needs to get more creative and bring out some style.

 

[Iggy]

It all comes down to Locke.

 

[Trip]

I think phun came harder with his rebuttals and had more creativity in his punchlines. Both were equal in terms of flow and in the end it came down to phun using more creativity and coming up with more lethal lines that got him the win.

My vote: phunDamentalz

 

[Chutney]

Good battle guys and congrats to the winner, phunDamentalz. Final result: 3-1.