Bachelor Parties: Lamest and Coolest

[bigbailes]

I remember once we hired some strippers to the room for a bachelor party in Vegas, one was actually from Portland and she froze up when she knew I was from there and knew people.

We were at a strip club down there for a bachelor party and just bullshitting with a couple girls and told them we were from Vancouver. One of the girls had the same reaction, we kind of figured she was bullshitting us but turns out we had some mutual friends and she was naming people and schools from there. Was a pretty crazy coincidence, but she also gave hands down the best lap dance I've ever had for $20. That was before I realized how many girls that 'work' just fly down for the weekends, make their $$$ and head back to their 'normal' lives.

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

We were at a strip club down there for a bachelor party and just bullshitting with a couple girls and told them we were from Vancouver. One of the girls had the same reaction, we kind of figured she was bullshitting us but turns out we had some mutual friends and she was naming people and schools from there. Was a pretty crazy coincidence, but she also gave hands down the best lap dance I've ever had for $20. That was before I realized how many girls that 'work' just fly down for the weekends, make their $$$ and head back to their 'normal' lives.

Yup, Thursday and Sundays are the "stripper flights". Its pretty funny. They have the girls bunch into apartments off strip for cheap, and they make thousands of dollars in a night.

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

I remember the first bachelor party I went to was in some dude's basement in the Inland Empire. Probably the year or two after getting out of college. As a free man, I subscribed to the Playboy Channel like any young chap would.

Turns out one of the strippers was a background girl in one of the shows they had there (night calls or some shit)? When we were doing whipped cream shots, I went to motherfucking town. It was glorious.

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

Have you guys ever gone to a divorce party? holy shit, they make Bachelor Parties seem like Sesame Street. I've only been to one....we'll just say tickets on Amtrak were involved.

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

No black box? Amateur.

Direct TV bro. I watched scrambled porn in high school

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

Night Calls and Shannon Tweed softcore porn. I remember it all with fondness.

I have a pic with Shannon Tweed. Went to the Porn convention in vegas back in the day.

Also have a cool pic w/ the girls from Nightcalls 411, Crystal Flowers and the black girl

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

You surely know Charmane Star, then?

I think so! It was a long time ago.

The one I went to town at the bachelor party was the thicker asian chick that used to be on the show. I think she was like a background dancer.

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

My big shot buddy took me to watch her dance at this club in Atlantic City once. Tiny girl, but hot. She's still good looking in her 40's but she's since quit the business I believe.

God, strip clubs in college were so fun. lolz.

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

I remember watching Jenna Jameson strip like in college at Deja Vu in the Valley out here. She was starting to blow up I think, I remember she danced to Rob Zombie's Dragula. We were all high as fuck, first time I did edibles. Afterwards, I was trippin balls over at pinks hot dogs in hollywood. There was a picture of fucking Webster on the wall of fame and I couldn't stop laughing.

 

[tlongII]

How about Kaylani Lei? Or Kobe Tai? Or Asia Carrera?

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

How about Kaylani Lei? Or Kobe Tai? Or Asia Carrera?

Kobe Tai was badass.

I remember one of my friends took Raylene to Prom or some shit. I was like WTF.

 

[tlongII]

Ugly face but banging bod, Miko Lee. Retired.

I always liked Kobe Tai. I was going to see her dance at a club here, but ended up having surgery instead. Lol

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

My favorite porn star back in the day was Aliyah Yi. I think she was also a background dancer.

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

One of my roomates in college dated a porn star, some skinny redhead girl. She wasn't super hot or famous but they were dating at the end of the year.

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

One of my friend's job was to write the porn movie descriptions for use on on-screen guides like Direct TV and cable, etc. It was hilarious, he would send me the rough drafts. Got into some cool parties as he was a marketing manager for Playboy.

 

[tlongII]

Lesser known girl and underrated, Mia Smile. A friend dated her.

A consultant I worked with went to Kobe’s show while I was in the hospital. He brought me back an autographed pic of Kobe Tai signed and addressed to me. Still have it!

 

[SlyPokerDog]

 

[Lanny]

I remember once we hired some strippers to the room for a bachelor party in Vegas, one was actually from Portland and she froze up when she knew I was from there and knew people.

I was at a bachelor party in Hillsboro one time and we were seated in a rough circle with two girls stripping for us when the guy next to me turns to me and exclaims that he had recently graduated from high school with one of the strippers.
Also, I use to watch this real good looking stripper when one day she starts attending my gym. I had evil thoughts flooding my brain.

 

[Lanny]

You know damn well brain had nothing to do with your evil thoughts, Lanny.

Was it my trusty very heavy pole and my two boys? They seem to have a mind of their own.