Battle Round 1 - MrJ vs Umair15

[Really Lost One]

This is round 1 of the battle tournament. Try your best. The winner will advance to the next round, while the loser will be eliminated. You have 2 days to battle back and forth, and then a winner will be announce by the following criteria:

1. Originality ..../10
2. Rhyme Scheme ..../10
3. Creativity ..../10
4. Rebutals ..../10
5. Flow ..../10

total _____/50

Good luck! And have fun. Remember, if you are busy, I can always extend the time for the battle.

 

[Mr. J]

*Turns on Grinding beat*

Chea, uh, uh, yo, yo, yo...

I come from Harlem, so I’m always strapped with a vest
Like old Wizards throwbacks, I’ll put bullets on your chest
So bring you’re A-Game, son. I always have mine handy.
If you don’t you’ll be M.I.A. just like the team Miami.
I’m known worldwide, been everywhere like M-Two-One
And again like Miami, I pack Heat like them too, son.
I’m the King, MrJ. Also known as that number one negro
Since I’m too nice for you, just cut yourself like as if you were emo.

From your girls, I get action rocking my sporty drawers.
My rhymes are Thrillas like Jackson’s and 44’s.
If you talk reckless, just know I’m a heat squeezer
I’m getting good looking girls, while you’re still a meat-beater
I hear you also try to act hard, but you’re still a fake mobster
So I’ll eat you up like my name was Mel and you were a plate of lobster.
Everyone stop the lying, this User’s dead.
I’ll talk to Brian about making you a loser thread.
Everybody owns him so I won’t be the first to trash him
And as you can see P.A.P. ain’t the only lyrical assassin

 

[umair]

Lol i suck at this but here goes nothing

Yo.. DJ turn on the beat..
Watch me kill MrJ and take the lead
Man hold up, im so tired, my hands hurt
I am sweating, lemme wipe my sweat off my shirt
MrJ is wack, he cant rap
He sucks and deserves a slap
I rock these forums, and own this place.
So move on and give me space.
Lemme pull out a real one
MrJ you suck, because I have just won
Dont hate because you are too late
Crazy as it sounds im conflicted to drop beats
Sit all ya back in ur seats and loose feelin of ur feet
Ill make it short cuz my rhymes could write a book
But that would leave u scared a lil bit sick and shook
So someone out here check it out give me props
How i make ur hair stand up and u eardrums pop
Yall runnin crazy like someone just got shot
But its just me rappin something that u can stop

YEAH..

Ey thats a good try..My first time btw.
I made up and wrote the bold part in advance
The other part just came off the top of my head..

 

[Mr. J]

Uh, uh, yo...

I even gave your sister play.
She’s a hoe, so fo’ sho’ she knows Mister J.
His girl’s name is Poochie, she’s a ordinary hoochie
To get in her coochie I just got her some fake Gucci.
While your bagging meals for people over at B.K.
I’m bagging hoes from Saturdays2Sundays with C.K.
This rap thing here, I’m in the game like EA
So when your girls here my name, I get a BJ
Because I beat clowns like you, a king is what I became
I know you want to, but you’re not nice enough to beat J.
And as the King, I own this thread—this ain’t even your casa.
Again, I’m undefeated. If you don’t believe that stat, than ask Durvasa.

The fact that you replied is why your losing hard.
Aren't you that same cat thinking Barkley was a shooting guard?

 

[umair]

What??lmao

Rocking with the stats is my boy is Durvasa
You suck, go back to your casa
Go lay on the bed, think again
I dont wanna mess you up and cause some pain
Your lyrics suck, they are trash
I ball em up, throw em in da pool, cause a splash
My sister aint a hoe, your momma is one, which is fo'sho
She got a nice booty, which go up and down
She is so fugly, she look like a clown
She is a little flirty
But gets in the bed and knows how to get dirty
She did a split
So i got my hands, and grabbed her tits!
They were big and wobbly
But I just grabbed em softly..
It was nice and fun
We woke up in the morning together and watched the sun

CHYEA!

 

[Mr. J]

I know you want a shakeup just to see me fail, son.
But we have a better chance seeing you in makeup and getting your nails done.
Your rhymes suck, it?ll be best if you just retire
Cuz the only time you?ll have hot bars is if your jail cell is on fire
Talk stupid, I might just have to smoke the banger
My rhymes stay off the hook like a broken hanger
Another emcee for me to eat, so let me get my pig on
If you didn?t know before, I spit nastier than Cassell with a wig on.
Me and Swish be stacking riches and bagging bitches
Because I?m sick, I?ll stick to sharing more verses
And as a chick, stick to wearing your purses.
I'm from NYC, so I'm always repping that great city.
My lines will put you out commision but nope, I'm not shapecity.

 

[umair]

<div class="quote_poster">Quoting MrJ:</div><div class="quote_post">I know you want a shakeup just to see me fail, son.
But we have a better chance seeing you in makeup and getting your nails done.
Your rhymes suck, it?ll be best if you just retire
Cuz the only time you?ll have hot bars is if your jail cell is on fire
Talk stupid, I might just have to smoke the banger
My rhymes stay off the hook like a broken hanger
Another emcee for me to eat, so let me get my pig on
If you didn?t know before, I spit nastier than Cassell with a wig on.
Me and Swish be stacking riches and bagging bitches
Because I?m sick, I?ll stick to sharing more verses
And as a chick, stick to wearing your purses.
I'm from NYC, so I'm always repping that great city.
My lines will put you out commision but nope, I'm not shapecity.</div>

Look at your lines, you call me son
They are failures, and mines are number one
If i get my nails done,
How is mom your mom gon live without the fun
I pay her every night, she gon' be broke and sit around going on a diet.
You think I should retire
Your lines are fake, they need to go and burn in the fire.
You cant rap, how many times do I say that, just go home and get a nap.
Im repping that place called htown.
Has a great downtown.
I roll my slabs in the streets of htown
Look at my boy MrJ sucking dick with his facedown.

 

[Mr. J]

You’re still talking? Man, I thought you had retired.
Even my boy Tribute thinks Umair should be fired.
Everyone can murder you from Ray J, to Jay_Ray.
From Chutney to Buckwheat, so enough please.
You’re not real, you’re a faker man, so I’m gonna bring the hammer
Yes, I’m the Real Deal, but I’m not a Laker fan or a spammer.
I should retire? You should listen, while I dictate
Cuz I’ll give you long hiatus like your name was Squishface

 

[umair]

<div class="quote_poster">Quoting MrJ:</div><div class="quote_post">You?re still talking? Man, I thought you had retired.
Even my boy Tribute thinks Umair should be fired.
Everyone can murder you from Ray J, to Jay_Ray.
From Chutney to buckwheat, so enough please.
You?re not real, you?re a faker man, so I?m gonna bring the hammer
Yes, I?m the Real Deal, but I?m not a Laker fan or a spammer.
I should retire? You should listen, while I dictate
Cuz I?ll give you long hiatus like your name was Squishface</div>

Me and retiring? Think again..
I thought you were sucking dick back in htown.
So you are ready to rap, but first go wear your gown
Im not a faker, your just made cuz u is a sucky ass hater
Squishface?Thats a gay name
Shut up before I knock you out with a punch and make you lose your fame.
Im not wack, you are just mad because you lack
MrJ, are you still sucking dick? If not
Then come here again, because I have another stick.

 

[Legacy]

MrJ wins, enogh said.

 

[Trip]

I think MrJ wins because Umair was the butt of all jokes. Is that enough reason?

 

[Chutney]

I voted for MrJ.

No contest, really. MrJ was better in every category and this was the most uneven matchup of the first round (pending on Voodoo Child's rap).

 

[phunDamentalz]

Mr J

"Your lyrics suck, they are trash
I ball em up, throw em in da pool, cause a splash"
LMAO that is classic though

 

[Legacy]

Umair asked a guy to suck his dick.

 

[44Thrilla]

I vote for MrJ because his raps weren't really crappy like Umair's.

 

[umair]

Aww..gimme some credit..haters..lol

 

[50]

MrJ killed this dude. And Umair, they give credit where credit is do.

 

[Iggy]

i gotta go with mr. j
but umair can we get you to spit one last time?

 

[Karma]

I voted for Umair. Not only were EVERY SINGLE one of his lines a classic, his verses left an impression in all the rest of the rapper's hearts, to the point where he was immortalized in all of the other verses in this tourney so far. If that's not skills, I don't know what is.

And I don't know if there will ever be a line greater than

"MrJ, are you still sucking dick? If not
Then come here again, because I have another stick"

or

Im repping that place called htown.
Has a great downtown.
I roll my slabs in the streets of htown

Who else can rhyme Htown within three bars twice? BEAT THAT MrJ.

Having said all that, I think everyone knows who my vote is for...let's just say, it's the person who didn't rhyme Htown with Htown and ask another guy to suck his dick.

Umair, next tourney, you'll win it for sure.

 

[Iggy]

^^^ yo umair your the milt palacio of rap! thats all i have to say

 

[Bobcats]

<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post">They were big and wobbly
But I just grabbed em softly..
It was nice and fun
We woke up in the morning together and watched the sun</div>

Genius. Pure Genius.

 

[P.A.P.]

<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post">My sister aint a hoe, your momma is one, which is fo'sho</div>

Best.One-liner.Ever.

 

[Squishface]

<div class="quote_poster">Quoting vcwannabe15:</div><div class="quote_post">Umair asked a guy to suck his dick.

</div>


He must know what he's talking about. I tell you, those women, they just got nothing on us when it comes to suckin' dick.

 

[Laker_fan]

Umair15 wins the guy is the most talked about MC in JBB history.

<div class="quote_poster">Quoting Umair15:</div><div class="quote_post">You cant rap, how many times do I say that, just go home and get a nap.</div>

Best line period.

<div class="quote_poster">Quoting Umair15:</div><div class="quote_post">I roll my slabs in the streets of htown
Look at my boy MrJ sucking dick with his facedown.</div>

He said MrJ is his boy. Who else calls the opponent in the battle their boy?

 

[Bobcats]

<div class="quote_poster">Quoting Laker_fan:</div><div class="quote_post">He said MrJ is his boy. Who else calls the opponent in the battle their boy?</div>

Ultra talented MC's like Umair. Duh.