I suspended Mediocre Man for 3 days.

[Natebishop3]

No, there isn't. Because our life experience is not and will never be on the same level as a woman, a black man, or a homosexual. Context is key to responding properly to any situation. Ignoring these fundamental differences essentially strips the humanity from our response. We have the ability to reason and discern; context-based nuanced response is evidence of that ability.

It just seems wrong to me, like it's culturally acceptable for a woman to slap a man, but it's unacceptable for a man to slap a woman. We teach our girls that it's okay to be violent towards men, but we teach our boys that it's unacceptable to be violent towards women.

What is wrong with that picture? The rules should be the same for everyone. You insult someone, you are punished. If a woman slaps a man, that's assault.

And for the record, Zags used personal information to try to hurt MM. Similarly, MM used personal information to try to hurt BF. He knows she's a woman, and he knows calling her a whore is going to hurt more than other insults, so in my opinion both instances are examples of using personal information to try to provoke and attack. The punishment should be the same.

 

[bodyman5000 and 1]

oh, I hired some girl in india to be Cass. Sorry bro.

Didn't say it was her.

 

[TradeNurkicNow]

MM knows full well that speech has consequences. I've told him racially-heated arguments in the OT section many times, he can say whatever word he wants but to assume there will be no social consequences is foolish.

 

[Hobbesarable]

It just seems wrong to me, like it's culturally acceptable for a woman to slap a man, but it's unacceptable for a man to slap a woman. We teach our girls that it's okay to be violent towards men, but we teach our boys that it's unacceptable to be violent towards women.

What is wrong with that picture? The rules should be the same for everyone. You insult someone, you are punished. If a woman slaps a man, that's assault.

And for the record, Zags used personal information to try to hurt MM. Similarly, MM used personal information to try to hurt BF. He knows she's a woman, and he knows calling her a whore is going to hurt more than other insults, so in my opinion both instances are examples of using personal information to try to provoke and attack. The punishment should be the same.

Nate championing for internet equality. I can back that, brother!

 

[bodyman5000 and 1]

It just seems wrong to me, like it's culturally acceptable for a woman to slap a man, but it's unacceptable for a man to slap a woman. We teach our girls that it's okay to be violent towards men, but we teach our boys that it's unacceptable to be violent towards women.

What is wrong with that picture? The rules should be the same for everyone. You insult someone, you are punished. If a woman slaps a man, that's assault.

And for the record, Zags used personal information to try to hurt MM. Similarly, MM used personal information to try to hurt BF. He knows she's a woman, and he knows calling her a whore is going to hurt more than other insults, so in my opinion both instances are examples of using personal information to try to provoke and attack. The punishment should be the same.

To play devil's advocate what I've been saying for years is that when most people insult someone they choose the obvious thing. I believe that a lot of racial insults are just reactionary. I know there are millions of racists out there but it would be the same if some fat girl almost killed me with her car. I'd probably call her a blubbery ****. Or some variation. I don't have any ill will towards fat girls.


Forgot the devil's advocate part. If someone is getting into an argument with someone and one person uses what we deem minor insults, and gets away with it.....if the other person gets pissed and uses one of what we deem is one of the bad ones.....what then?

 

[Natebishop3]

From what I've seen, intent is the extra factor that goes into Sly's modding decisions. People insult Mags constantly for being rich, Asian, having a hot wife, etc. These insults contain vulgarities and racially insensitive words. But it's obvious to most that all parties are in on it and it's in good fun. MM called BF a whore to shut her down.

Intent is obviously a difficult thing to weigh over internet communication. I think Sly does a good job at judging the intent of the many, many insults hurled on this board. His transparency after the fact makes these kinds of conversations possible.

Zags intent was no different than MM's. Use personal information to provoke and to hurt.

So why was the punishment different? Because Sly perceived MM's attack to be worse, but why was it worse? Calling someone a whore is really no different than calling someone an asshole. Unless she is, in fact, a whore.... it should be no different than any other generic insult. On the other hand, poking fun at someone losing custody of children that they were taking care of is much more personal and hurtful.

I guess that's just my opinion though.

 

[Denny Crane]

To be honest, MM's been a problem poster for a while now. It's not this one incident that's all by itself enough to warrant the suspension. Think of it as the straw that broke the camel's back.

 

[Natebishop3]

MM knows full well that speech has consequences. I've told him racially-heated arguments in the OT section many times, he can say whatever word he wants but to assume there will be no social consequences is foolish.

I'm not debating that there shouldn't be consequences. I'm debating whether the consequences should be the same.

 

[blazerboy30]

Why does this matter? Sly has gone above and beyond to make this a productive conversation about his modding decisions. Trying to turn this into a deconstruction of "acceptable" insults will go nowhere. Degrees of offense are culturally bound. The only reason you're asking that question over and over is because you think you already know the answer. However, there is no correct answer. It will be different for different people.

Possibly the first time you and I have ever agreed on this board.

 

[Boob-No-More]

I think the mods should require proof that people who give out that much personal info on the board are actually who they say they are. I am not gonna say which female poster I am talking about but one of them past or present is just super hot to me and I for one demand proof that she is/was the real thing.

Ladies and gentlemen, it seems we have a celebrity in our midst. I'd like to be the first to officially welcome Manti Te'o to S2!

BNM

 

[Natebishop3]

To be honest, MM's been a problem poster for a while now. It's not this one incident that's all by itself enough to warrant the suspension. Think of it as the straw that broke the camel's back.

So has Zags.

 

[Stevenson]

Well done. That's your job - to moderate.

And in any case, the misogyny here is often WAY over the line.

 

[SlyPokerDog]

Zags intent was no different than MM's. Use personal information to provoke and to hurt.

So why was the punishment different? Because Sly perceived MM's attack to be worse, but why was it worse? Calling someone a whore is really no different than calling someone an asshole. Unless she is, in fact, a whore.... it should be no different than any other generic insult. On the other hand, poking fun at someone losing custody of children that they were taking care of is much more personal and hurtful.

I guess that's just my opinion though.

I'm not disagreeing with you. That's why I brought up the Zags thing in the first place. The "including personal information to insult someone" is a good point about what was wrong with Zags' post.

 

[PapaG]

So there isn't an insult that I can use against you that would draw the same reaction as MM calling her a whore?

No, but some posters have been banned for posting PMs directed at them that call them every name in the book. <cough cough>

 

[PapaG]

From what I've seen, intent is the extra factor that goes into Sly's modding decisions. People insult Mags constantly for being rich, Asian, having a hot wife, etc. These insults contain vulgarities and racially insensitive words. But it's obvious to most that all parties are in on it and it's in good fun. MM called BF a whore to shut her down.

Intent is obviously a difficult thing to weigh over internet communication. I think Sly does a good job at judging the intent of the many, many insults hurled on this board. His transparency after the fact makes these kinds of conversations possible.

I'm agreeing with hoojacks more often than I'd like to admit these days.

 

[TradeNurkicNow]

Zags intent was no different than MM's. Use personal information to provoke and to hurt.

So why was the punishment different? Because Sly perceived MM's attack to be worse, but why was it worse? Calling someone a whore is really no different than calling someone an asshole. Unless she is, in fact, a whore.... it should be no different than any other generic insult. On the other hand, poking fun at someone losing custody of children that they were taking care of is much more personal and hurtful.

I guess that's just my opinion though.

(I'm assuming we belong to the same culture.) To me, whore and asshole are very different. Calling a woman a whore means that she is at best promiscuous and at worst a prostitute. Calling a woman an asshole means she's mean spirited. Calling a man a whore means he is promiscuous. Calling a man an asshole means he's mean spirited.

Man as asshole and woman as asshole are the same.
Man as whore and woman as whore are different.

Traditionally (up to the present day), men as celebrated for their promiscuity. Women are shunned for it, and the idea of women even considering sex with multiple partners has been used as an insult for time immemorial.

In regards to Zags talking about MM's family... yeah that's fucked up. But we're talking about personal insults, which we usually think of as single words or phrases designed to hurt or intimidate. Zags was being a dick with what he said, but I don't think it was an insult. It was perhaps insulting.

 

[Denny Crane]

So has Zags.

There are no ongoing threads for weeks or months about Zags in the staff forum. There are a number about MM and his latest antics and complaint from other posters about him.

As long as we're being transparent.

 

[bodyman5000 and 1]

Ladies and gentlemen, it seems we have a celebrity in our midst. I'd like to be the first to officially welcome Manti Te'o to S2!

BNM

It's not Cass/Kass or whatever but even Manti more cash than me so I'd be fine with that.

 

[PapaG]

I still think this is the most classless thing on this board, since the moderator who uses it made it knowing the health of my kids.

 

[PtldPlatypus]

It just seems wrong to me, like it's culturally acceptable for a woman to slap a man, but it's unacceptable for a man to slap a woman. We teach our girls that it's okay to be violent towards men, but we teach our boys that it's unacceptable to be violent towards women.

What is wrong with that picture? The rules should be the same for everyone. You insult someone, you are punished. If a woman slaps a man, that's assault.

And for the record, Zags used personal information to try to hurt MM. Similarly, MM used personal information to try to hurt BF. He knows she's a woman, and he knows calling her a whore is going to hurt more than other insults, so in my opinion both instances are examples of using personal information to try to provoke and attack. The punishment should be the same.

I'm more of the opinion that it's wrong for a woman to hit a man, but it's more wrong for a man to hot a woman because of the intrinsic physical differences between the sexes. Our that it's wrong to insult someone, but it's more wrong to insult someone based on their skin color or gender. It basically sounds like you're suggesting that ignoring sexism or racism is the way to make it disappear, and I completely disagree worth that notion. People don't change unless there's an incentive (or disincentive) that motivates that change. Fact is, culturally, societally, the disincentive to combat racism and sexism (among other -isms) is to respond more strongly when they occur. It's perfectly reasonable.

As for MZ's comment, I agree that he should be suspended too. What he said about MM, pissed me off, even moreso after he responded further completely unapologetic about it. That crap has no place here.

 

[blue32]

Sounds good. I approve of any and all timeouts for people blatantly being a dick.

 

[bodyman5000 and 1]

I remember the time I put my phone number on one of the boards and Kingspeed called me. I told him PapaG was a ***. I felt bad afterwards.

 

[oldmangrouch]

I think the question was already asked, but what is an actual insult for a heterosexual white man that you would put on the same level as calling a woman a whore?

Are straight white guys completely unprotected from abuse? Are we supposed to just take whatever abuse people throw at us?

This is where MM's complaints go off the rails. Playing the victim card? Seriously?

Busting somebody's chops is one thing. Rage is something else. MM would never tolerate someone calling his wife a whore, or his foster kids n****r.....but he wants to be free to use those terms himself. Seems to me he is the one with the double standard!

 

[blazerboy30]

No. That's the point. Is there an insult that you can use to offend a straight white guy on the same level as calling a woman a whore?

Probably calling your wife / fiance / daughter a whore.

 

[TradeNurkicNow]

I still think this is the most classless thing on this board, since the moderator who uses it made it knowing the health of my kids.

Actually, I made that for barfo.

Just when I was on your good side.

 

[SlyPokerDog]

I still think this is the most classless thing on this board, since the moderator who uses it made it knowing the health of my kids.

I will PM him and ask him to remove it.

 

[bodyman5000 and 1]

I still think this is the most classless thing on this board, since the moderator who uses it made it knowing the health of my kids.

If that is what you feel each time you see it then it should be removed. I don't remember the exact story but it was about Lupus or something and I did watch House and recognize the reference so I am not taking sides.......my point is that we can all live without it and even though it shouldn't be banned the person using it should volunteer to take it down.

 

[Hobbesarable]

I'm more of the opinion that it's wrong for a woman to hit a man, but it's more wrong for a man to hot a woman because of the intrinsic physical differences between the sexes. Our that it's wrong to insult someone, but it's more wrong to insult someone based on their skin color or gender. It basically sounds like you're suggesting that ignoring sexism or racism is the way to make it disappear, and I completely disagree worth that notion. People don't change unless there's an incentive (or disincentive) that motivates that change. Fact is, culturally, societally, the disincentive to combat racism and sexism (among other -isms) is to respond more strongly when they occur. It's perfectly reasonable.

As for MZ's comment, I agree that he should be suspended too. What he said about MM, pissed me off, even moreso after he responded further completely unapologetic about it. That crap has no place here.

Yes, there's phsyical abuse. There's also psychological abuse that's becoming more of an inherent problem in all aspects of the internet. The psychological abuse should be the focus of this thread if you guys and gals are wanting to go down that road.

 

[PapaG]

I remember the time I put my phone number on one of the boards and Kingspeed called me. I told him PapaG was a ***. I felt bad afterwards.

Yet now we're cool with each other. Funny how that works!

 

[bodyman5000 and 1]

Yet now we're cool with each other. Funny how that works!

I'm cool with everyone homeslice. Plus I'm getting old. Fuck man I yelled at my mom that I hated her when I was 15. Didn't everyone? I don't hold grudges over words.

Not for too long anyway.