If I were Greg Oden...

[Rastapopoulos]

1. I would shake my fist at the heavens and shout "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!???" for about half an hour.
2. Then I'd go and get shitfaced.
3. I would then relocate back to Indiana to get away from the vast palpable cloud of gloom and resentment that envelopes Portland.
4. I would contact everybody who worked with Amare Stoudemire and work, not just on getting my knee fixed, but my entire body realigned, if not for a future in basketball, just for my own benefit.
5. After surgeries, I would volunteer at a juvenile cancer ward, and realize that actually, I've got it pretty good.
6. I would go back to school while recuperating, and try to prepare for a life without basketball.
7. I would come back and dominate the league, leading the franchise that wisely stuck with me to multiple championships.
or:
7a) I would become a very tall dentist.

 

[Hey]

But he's a Christian.

 

[julius]

1. I would shake my fist at the heavens and shout "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!???" for about half an hour.
2. Then I'd go and get shitfaced.
3. I would then relocate back to Indiana to get away from the vast palpable cloud of gloom and resentment that envelopes Portland.
4. I would contact everybody who worked with Amare Stoudemire and work, not just on getting my knee fixed, but my entire body realigned, if not for a future in basketball, just for my own benefit.
5. After surgeries, I would volunteer at a juvenile cancer ward, and realize that actually, I've got it pretty good.
6. I would go back to school while recuperating, and try to prepare for a life without basketball.
7. I would come back and dominate the league, leading the franchise that wisely stuck with me to multiple championships.

Those aren't terribly unwise decisions. He should try to rehab outside of the Portland area (even though fans felt morally outraged that he dare not rehab front and center).

#5 would be a good thing for a lot of people to do, not just Greg Oden. Including posters here and fans in general.

 

[BBert]

1. I would shake my fist at the heavens and shout "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!???" for about half an hour.
2. Then I'd go and get shitfaced.
3. I would then relocate back to Indiana to get away from the vast palpable cloud of gloom and resentment that envelopes Portland.
4. I would contact everybody who worked with Amare Stoudemire and work, not just on getting my knee fixed, but my entire body realigned, if not for a future in basketball, just for my own benefit.
5. After surgeries, I would volunteer at a juvenile cancer ward, and realize that actually, I've got it pretty good.
6. I would go back to school while recuperating, and try to prepare for a life without basketball.
7. I would come back and dominate the league, leading the franchise that wisely stuck with me to multiple championships.
or:
7a) I would become a very tall dentist.

A dentist, LOL. I know he said it, but was he serious? Could you imagine trying to get those gigantic hands into someones mouth to do a root canal, or even a simple exam?

Great list, BTW.

 

[KingSpeed]

1. I would shake my fist at the heavens and shout "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!???" for about half an hour.
2. Then I'd go and get shitfaced.
3. I would then relocate back to Indiana to get away from the vast palpable cloud of gloom and resentment that envelopes Portland.
4. I would contact everybody who worked with Amare Stoudemire and work, not just on getting my knee fixed, but my entire body realigned, if not for a future in basketball, just for my own benefit.
5. After surgeries, I would volunteer at a juvenile cancer ward, and realize that actually, I've got it pretty good.
6. I would go back to school while recuperating, and try to prepare for a life without basketball.
7. I would come back and dominate the league, leading the franchise that wisely stuck with me to multiple championships.
or:
7a) I would become a very tall dentist.

Great post.

 

[santeesioux]

If i were Greg Oden i'd become the next Lexington Steele.

 

[HailBlazers]

1. I would shake my fist at the heavens and shout "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!???" for about half an hour.
2. Then I'd go and get shitfaced.
3. I would then relocate back to Indiana to get away from the vast palpable cloud of gloom and resentment that envelopes Portland.
4. I would contact everybody who worked with Amare Stoudemire and work, not just on getting my knee fixed, but my entire body realigned, if not for a future in basketball, just for my own benefit.
5. After surgeries, I would volunteer at a juvenile cancer ward, and realize that actually, I've got it pretty good.
6. I would go back to school while recuperating, and try to prepare for a life without basketball.
7. I would come back and dominate the league, leading the franchise that wisely stuck with me to multiple championships.
or:
7a) I would become a very tall dentist.

The Saga Continues! Aint over till the fat lady sings Blazer Manics

 

[Natebishop3]

If I were Greg Oden, I would see if they're still doing that celebrity boxing show. Or better yet, maybe I would do The Apprentice because it doesn't require any physical contact.

 

[BLAZER PROPHET]

I think I'd go home for a year or two, lose some weight and just let my knees heal. Then at that time maybe start working out (if I could) and just see what happens.

 

[Nikolokolus]

The Saga Continues! Aint over till the fat lady sings Blazer Manics

What a completely useless cliche'

 

[julius]

The Saga Continues! Aint over till the fat lady sings Blazer Manics

If she's not singing now, it's only because she's lost her voice from singing to loud.

 

[Natebishop3]

The Saga Continues! Aint over till the fat lady sings Blazer Manics

Kobe is about to start singing.

 

[PapaG]

Oden already has the 'get shitfaced' part down pat.

Glug glug glug

 

[Mediocre Man]

If I were Greg I would put my millions in the bank and live comfortably in some ocean or sea front country off the interest.

 

[Stevenson]

If I were Greg I would put my millions in the bank and live comfortably in some ocean or sea front country off the interest.

Of course this is the right answer.

You have to be worried about his ability to walk, not play hoops, at this point. I've had three far less serious leg surgeries and think its a miracle that I am not a gimp.

 

[3RA1N1AC]

hes like the boogyman, people were scared of him, but he never. really. existed.

 

[handiman]

I don't want Oden's knees anywhere near my teeth. In any sense.

 

[oldguy]

I suspect that there will always be a place for him as a male prostitute.

Go Blazers