Let's Get Roy a Decent Nickname

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e_blazer

e_blazer

Rip City Fan
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I mean, seriously, "Yellow mamba"? That's just wrong on so many levels...mimicking Kobe, yellow = slang for coward, potentially offensive to orientals, and it's messed up in that the black mamba doesn't get its name for its skin color, but rather the color of its mouth.

Anyway, I think we should put our collective heads together and see what we can come up with. I propose that we post ideas to this thread today and, starting tomorrow, we'll group them into a series of polls for a vote-off. Maybe ABM can pass the winner onto Brian Wheeler.

To start things off, I'll propose "O-B-Roy" after Obi-wan Kenobi. Can anybody doubt that dude uses Jedi mind tricks to get to the hole?
 
"The Count" He kinda looks like a vampire and he drains the life out of his opponents. He also drains shots, mesmerizes his competition, and has a hunger that won't go away.
 
This team will not win a Title until Roy and Martell abandon their anal-rapist man-crush.

It shows they still don't quite understand Portland fans and why fans were willing to accept a 6-year rebuild of the team.
 
The Snake Charmer - because of the way he lulled Kobe to sleep then drained shots over him.

I also love The Natural.
 
Here are my two choices:

1. Brandon

2. Roy

Nicknames aren't something that are made up; they come naturally. The Stilt, The Big O, Magic, The Chief, The Dream, Glide, all of those fit. Let's not force it. Some players just don't have easy nicknames.
 
MARIS61 said:
This team will not win a Title until Roy and Martell abandon their anal-rapist man-crush.

It shows they still don't quite understand Portland fans and why fans were willing to accept a 6-year rebuild of the team.
Click to expand...

WTF are you talking about? :sigh:
 
Rosen One.
 
Sug said:
WTF are you talking about? :sigh:
Click to expand...

Roy and Martell both respect Kobe. Martell works out with Kobe in the off season.

I don't think you could call it a man crush, though. Roy isn't going to cry any tears if Portland beats the Lakers in the playoffs.
 
especially if (when?!?!) that dude Maxamilion pulls together the Game 6 highlight of us clinching the WC championship, set to "the Final Game" from Rudy.

Make it so, Number One.
 
e_blazer said:
I mean, seriously, "Yellow mamba"? That's just wrong on so many levels...mimicking Kobe, yellow = slang for coward, potentially offensive to orientals, and it's messed up in that the black mamba doesn't get its name for its skin color, but rather the color of its mouth.

Anyway, I think we should put our collective heads together and see what we can come up with. I propose that we post ideas to this thread today and, starting tomorrow, we'll group them into a series of polls for a vote-off. Maybe ABM can pass the winner onto Brian Wheeler.

To start things off, I'll propose "O-B-Roy" after Obi-wan Kenobi. Can anybody doubt that dude uses Jedi mind tricks to get to the hole?
Click to expand...


calling asian's orientals is potentially more offensive...
 
The Sandman... because he puts people to sleep. And then you can rock the Metallica song during all his highlights.
 
Captain Caveman.

Whenever he scores, the PA system should blast a "Captain CaaAAaaAAAaaveman!"

It works.
 
I've hated "the natural" as a nickname since the moment I heard it. Then I gave it a chance. I still kinda hate it, but maybe not as much. Anytime I hear wheeler call him that I cringe though.

Roy's game is all about pace and basketball fundamentals, not natural organic talent. If anything Roy's game is manufactured, Roy is about the basics.
He's also super clutch, though he's going to need to continue to provide that in the playoffs.

The sandman is kinda fitting. Doesn't someone already have that one though?

I also like,

The fundamental: too long, i know.

and finally,

The element: cause he takes people out of their element and puts them in his. There's also the connection that the elements are the basic building blocks of existence. Roy's game is all about the basics of basketball.
 
Perhaps something could be made from the fact that roy/roi means "king" in French...and that's where the word "royalty" comes from. But off-hand, I don't know what to do with that. "King" is already in use, more naturally, by LeBron James. "Prince" doesn't really sound good. "Royalty" doesn't have any natural application..."Royalty for three" doesn't work.
 
The Graduate? A true student of the game, went to college all four years... etc.
 
See what a tough fit a nickname is for him? Like I said before, sometimes nicknames just have to come naturally. If they don't then he's just "Brandon" or "Roy". Personally, I always think of him as the Stepford player. It's like he's programmed to say all the right things and make all the right decisions.
 
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