Real Tweet From an Auburn Football Player

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PapaG

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Account has since been deleted, but it's been captured in the interwebs. Some freshman named Jordan Spriggs literally Tweeted this today.

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I should get in touch with him. I'm awesome at writing papers.
 
just make sure they agree with the advisors' biases.
 
I can hardly wait until their national championship is voided.
 
maybe he could write an essay on the effects of vegetable poison on 200-y/o oak trees.
 
i heard on the radio (nothing read yet) that the poisoner is a 60y/o dude who was arrested today. Reminds me a bit of Saruman in LOTR, poisioning the Shire out of spite before Frodo came back.
 
In a story by ESPN's Mark Schlabach, Updyke is described a retired former Texas state trooper. One of his ex-wives says he has a daughter named Crimson and a son named Bear. His Facebook page includes a photo of him wearing a Crimson Tide hat and T-shirt.

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just put "updyke" into facebook search and see how famous this dude now is.
 
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He admitted to doing it on a local radio program in Alabama. 1080 just played the interview. This was before it became national news. He was pissed because someone put a Newton Uni on a statue of Bear Bryant. The radio host asked him "Isn't it illegal to poison trees?" This clown responded with "Do you think I care? Roll damn Tide...."

What a world class fuck stick.
 
He admitted to doing it on a local radio program in Alabama. 1080 just played the interview. This was before it became national news. He was pissed because someone put a Newton Uni on a statue of Bear Bryant. The radio host asked him "Isn't it illegal to poison trees?" This clown responded with "Do you think I care? Roll damn Tide...."

What a world class fuck stick.

Or, the coolest fan ever! ;)
 
I think it's sad that the tree was poisoned, but I think the whole thing is pretty funny overall.

This is a great opportunity for Auburn. Chop down the trees before they are worthless, cut them into 2x4 paddles and burn "Spank 'Bama" on them, and sell them to Aubie fans all over the country.

The revenue alone should pay for their players' "benefits" for the next 4-5 years. and the boosters being investigated by the FBI will get some down time to throw off the feds' sent!
 

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