The laws of man

[BALLAHOLLIC]

1. NEVER kneel the ball while playing Madden or run the time off the clock while playing NBA Live.2. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.3. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man.(In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional.)4. If a man's zipper is down, that's his problem---you didn't see nothin'.5. Never allow a conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone; Hang up if necessary.6. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.7. No man may own a dog smaller than a beach ball.8. No man should ever wear the color pink, NO it is not 'light red'9. If you and a buddy are walking side by side and your hands touch accidentally, do not acknowledge it.10. Men must not sit next to each other in an empty movie theater.11. Men Don't Share Meals12. Men NEVER order saladsMan laws for women:1. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.2. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.3. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.4. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.5. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.6. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.7. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends.8. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.9. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We've been tricked before!!10. Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot.11. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.12. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.

 

[yankshater213]

Proud to say that I've never taken a knee in Madden in my entire life.

 

[Rok]

So what's the punishment for breaking some of those laws. Because I can say I've broken 1, 3, 5, 8. 10's iffy, empty theater?

 

[Pacers fan forever]

Those are all dumb.

 

[Memphology]

your dumbMan Law?

 

[BrewCityBuck]

I made a thread like a month ago with all the official man laws...is this is a chunk of it or did you make these?

 

[IWORSHIPBENDER]

if a woman does not put out within the first 3 dates, DTB

 

[the_pestilence]

funny and true

 

[The Lefty]

No offense, but these suck

 

[The Captain]

What's up with the first one? Running out the clock is good sportsmanship. Why would you want to rub it in?

 

[jkidd51524]

I have done 1 (just if they are my friend, if its somebody I dont know, screw it hail mary or the 3) 5 and 10 kind of, does it count if there is a girl on the other side of you? lol

 

[jkidd51524]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (BrewCityBuck @ Jan 26 2007, 06:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div><div class='quotemain'>I made a thread like a month ago with all the official man laws...is this is a chunk of it or did you make these?</div>Do you still have the link?

 

[The Fray]

Why do RBS and BBW have the same EXACT threads? We copy off eachother, Rashadz posts this sites threads there and other people like BALLAHOLIC lol in this thread posts stuff from RBS.I did break one man law tho, the kneeling in Madden. Play it safe

 

[ElMaster]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (The Fray @ Jan 29 2007, 01:19 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div><div class='quotemain'>Why do RBS and BBW have the same EXACT threads? We copy off eachother, Rashadz posts this sites threads there and other people like BALLAHOLIC lol in this thread posts stuff from RBS.I did break one man law tho, the kneeling in Madden. Play it safe</div>Man I think this thread has been done on every forum in the internet so...

 

[STAT]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (BALLAHOLLIC? @ Jan 25 2007, 11:23 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div><div class='quotemain'>1. NEVER kneel the ball while playing Madden or run the time off the clock while playing NBA Live.2. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.3. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man.(In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional.)4. If a man's zipper is down, that's his problem---you didn't see nothin'.5. Never allow a conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone; Hang up if necessary.6. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.7. No man may own a dog smaller than a beach ball.8. No man should ever wear the color pink, NO it is not 'light red'9. If you and a buddy are walking side by side and your hands touch accidentally, do not acknowledge it.10. Men must not sit next to each other in an empty movie theater.11. Men Don't Share Meals12. Men NEVER order saladsMan laws for women:1. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.2. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.3. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.4. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.5. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.6. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.7. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends.8. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.9. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We've been tricked before!!10. Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot.11. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.12. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.</div> :HAHAHA: :HAHAHA: :HAHAHA: :HAHAHA:

 

[S_Gurad]

If you know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop then disregard these laws and google woman laws.If a woman cooks you dinner after an argument that you were wrong in, DONT eat it.If she lays in bed or any other non living object afterwords, DONT eat it.Eat Food not People.