Okay, I'm going to just post what I think of each verse as I read them. I'll bold what I think are the strong lines and italisize (sp) what I think are the weaker lines.
I'm going to be very frank because in the end it's constructive critiscm so take it how you want it.
VERSE 1
<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post">
whaddup little air fresh - or is it dumb bitch
you call out new york that was a real dumb pitch
youre mad cause in florida there ain't nothing to do
cept sit by the AC and peel some oranges dude...
that humid air is really sogging up your brain
cause challenging NY is a very foolish game
the warm weather must be nice don't get me wrong
you get to watch your mom walk around in a thong
life must be sweet in a state where everybody's eighty eight
i bet you get some nice ***** down there - shriveled up fish bait
you mention *** a few times in your rhymes that **** was Freudian
no wonder you brag about how you are so Floridian
cause you're from a state that's shaped like a penis
go get your FLA-ggots and we'll see who the hottest team is
</div>
I didn't really find this verse all that strong overall. The flow was on point most of the time, although it kinda slipped with the Freudian/Floridian line. The warm weather line didn't make any sense, I don't really understand why you're praising his state, and the mom walking in thong line was just weak.
<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post">
Phundamentalz you failed to realized that I’m in a league you can’t stand with
That means you can’t see AF, like your hosting account exceeded bandwith
It takes work to get to the top, so on the way ya face is what I am Stompin
You got a better chance surviving with red and blue clothes threw the city of Compton
If my opponents get in my way, then I demolish them—right now I’m in the tractor
An you pretty brave, cause battling Fresh should be a Stunt on Fear Factor
But you really think you have a chance? Son for you to win, there is really no-way
Everybody knows I got this bitch killed; I should change my rap name to Fresh-O-Jay
AF-Venom does it again, providing JBB with another Flamer
You accepted the challenge? Man you got more balls than Kramer
AF-Venom is a high quality MC, Phundamentalz is just a damn scrub
So in other words you cannot win, you might as well start the AF fan club
I won’t be faded, my raps on chronic disease--and to my opponents I’m just sicker
You Jay Feely soft, and the last New Yorker left—so I will definitely beat the kicker
I’m Pirating NYC, it’s in your best interest just to abandon the ship
This is the 91 First Round Series, I'm gettin 3 Wins and the Yorkers gettin zip*</div>
Some of your bars are really long ("You Jay Feely soft, and the last New Yorker left—so I will definitely beat the kicker" and "This is the 91 First Round Series, I'm gettin 3 Wins and the Yorkers gettin zip") and don't really flow in well with the rest of the verse. However, you had much stronger punches then that of phun. I though the OJ (orange juice/OJ Simpson) line you had was great (assuming you really were erferencing to both things) and so were the compton and fear factor lines. Only gripe with your verse would be the long bars and referring yourself as AF Venom at the beginning of two lines one after the other.
Verdict: AF wins.
VERSE 2
<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post">
Stinky Air, i don't know nothing 'bout Jay Feely
All i know is all the jbballers feel me
And this is b-ball so quit talking N-F-L
I'd rather live in hell than live in the F-L
You caught Mister Jay on an off day big deal
Then you called me out thinking you could keep it real
I read your battle with Gotskillz and no wonder he's bitter
I've had more lucid lines than you sitting on the shitter
Your tired-ass raps are giving new meaning to wack
That's five minutes of my life I won't get back
You South Beach queen you probably get your nuts waxed
Stupid rat you just walked into my trap
Florida mouse tried to step into my house?
Bitch please you must be retarded to take that route
Should be illegal the **** that flows out of your mouth
you think you're fresh go check your pits you need Axe Dry
it's just too bad they don't make Odor Eaters for rhymes
You ride a tractor, well that's really no surprise
You're just a hick spreading manure in all your lines
You're like a deaf dude trying to play musical chairs
Or like a blind man trying to run down the stairs
Talking about Kramer's balls well that is just wrong
And now i can't shake that picture of your mom in a thong
This battle's over but the nightmares are just beginning
I guess everything has it's price including Winning.....
</div>
Way too many generic/off-point lines in this one. The hick line, mom line and stupid rat lines all oculd have been better written or replaced with much better lines overall. It was an allright verse, but you need to cut down on personals that aren't really..all that personal. I don't think AF is a hick so I don't understand you calling him one and going back to the first rap tourney, mom/family jokes don't really work in keystyles.
<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post">
This is b-ball? ok, that means that I am the King of the Deuce
With your corny nursery rhymes, I've read better from Dr. Seus
Talkin greasy about the FL? You just need to take a seat dog
You spit fuc**n garbage, cause you inhale all that NY smog
Your sh!it is below subpar, but my rhymes are hella-stella
Air Fresh is starting his own dynasty in NYC like Rockafella
Man I got people across the country that always got my back
And I might wax my nuts, cause ya girl likes a clean sack
Even if I was musty, compared to you I'm still way more flyer
AF-Venom, I ride tracks better than them NASCAR Drivers
I live in the south so I'm a "hick"? Please, how original is that?
Also when is the last time a damn hick could be black?
Ask the last two dudes, lethal lyrical weapons is what I toat.
I got witnesses and your one of them, check ya last vote
By typing more lines, its just your weakness that you are showing
Killin you in this battle, so hell is really where you will be going
I usually stick to simplistic sick sixteens, but I've got something else in store
Another round cause like my hos, JBB is just begging B for more
Yall NYC dudes gas ya selves up, there must be something in ya air
9-1 in voting so far, I'd have better competition against Umair
The New Fresh Prince, I'm sentencing this lame a$$ dame to exile
"Long range shooting"? Add Rapping to Weaknesses in ya JBB Profile
If you think you got Fresh beat, you must be living on fantasy, island!!
I've never heard of any good rapper that comes from Dublin, Ireland!!
</div>
lol nice closer, and your verse was nice. Way to flip that hick line back on him, that was strong, but ease up on some of the generic lines (about ho's specifically). Your flow was better on this verse.
VERDICT: AF wins.
VERSE 3
<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post">
you got no game so you click on my profile
then you bring up Umair cause you really can't freestyle
yeah you get your insights from the J-B-B- forum
you should be an operator on 1-800-BOREDOM
and yeah i went on long cause i got a lot to say
what can i say there's not that much to do today
i like my job when the boss is a-way
I get to beat orlando girls who want to play
and plus my rhymes are gifts i've got to get them off my chest
I spit more jewels than you can spit Crest
um okay i didn't realize that you are black
that fact alone makes you ten times more wack
where is the inherent dopeness inside of you?
my rhymes attack you like mace kid- theyre blinding you
making up words like "my rhymes are hella stella"
just so you could use your wack line about Rockafella
and how long you been holding that NASCAR line in your pocket?
going on the internet trying to find the right time to drop it?
that s**ts transparent fool my words fly off the dome
you call me corny dawg but you're inducing groans
My raps are steaks while you're biting off the bone
This contest to me is like Chi-town to Capone
Cause i own this b!tch no one can take me down
Just like your girl I got this gagged and bound
Trust me in this lair nobody can touch me
Not even you a Cat in the Hat who just got lucky
cause gotskills has em and Mr Jay can spit
they don't keep coming with that same recycled s!!t
that's right rounds 1 and 2 for you were pure FLUKE
i'm showing you who's the daddy like Darth Vader to LUKE
NY rappers are sweet - yours are diabetic
why don't you take your game up north where s**t gets hectic?
and yeah i live on fantasy island whats it to ya?
better than repping dick-riding peninsula
i'll let you have the last word it's only fair
JBBallers y'all beware
here comes a weakling with a half a yard stare
prolly bout to drop a few more turds about Umair....
</div>
NICE! Your strongest verse so far BY FAR. The first 4 lines were great, but then you killed it with the 4 lines that came after that. The black/wack line doesn't really make any sense to me and seems irrelevant and the Rockafella flipped line is good, but the irony is that while you're dissing his rhyming style, you used the exact same rhyming that he did to make your punch. The Nascar line was solid - a great counter, and then after that you had a couple of good lines/bad lines. A solid verse overall though. If you had come like this in your other two, you would have had a much better shot at taking this.
<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post">
Being in this battle with me, with ya rap career ya gambling
Cause you are'nt talking about sh!t, just mumblin and ramblin
I come with recycled sh!t? For real how ironic can you get
Half of your lines are f**kin bull, about the state I represent
AF-Venom, you know I shine whenever the light be lime
Be killing these NY "ballas", like I was Air Jordan in his prime -- <font color=""Indigo"">[line would have been better if you'd put Reggie Miller but whatever]</font>
Clutch, so I got the rock in my hands whenever the game is on the line
And this battle is the Sixth game in Utah, therefore the victory is mine
To some I'm a beast, but to you, I'm an entire different species
On the other hand your disses and rebutalls are nothing but straight Feces
Its obvious I'm killin this dude lyrically, there is no need for investigation
and Its obvious that my rhymes are the sh!t, and go harder than constipation
The First quarter is over, in the second AF-Venom will unleash the wrath
I’ll have ya ass in the MRI room; I guarantee you won’t make it into the half
With ya b**ch a$$ lines, your verses are really not even respectable
You don’t want beef with B; you should stick to eating vegetables
With your fuc**n lame rhymes, your miniscule, so they don't hurt-me
Far from boring, but I'll knock you out, like Thanksgiving Turkey
When it comes to hot lines and hot rhymes, AF-Venom has got a hunch for a bunch
And In the game I’m hungry, so I eat wack MCs for breakfast*, dinner*, and lunch*
(“Gotskillz”*, Mr. J*, Phundamentalz*)
</div>
Nice verse once again. You gotta stop referencing to yourself in the 3rd person though, do it once or somehting but you did it like 3 times in this verse. Can't really complain about the verse, it was great all the way through...just work on cutting down some words i nsome of your bars cause most of your bars still tend to be way too long to flow smoothly with the line above it.
That's all.
Verdict: AF Wins
Well, that's 3 straight verses that AF took, so obviously AF gets my vote.
Good battle guys.