Carlos Mencia is the biggest fraud in show business

[Minstrel]

Then refute this: In the past 10 years, Orion's Boat has consistently not sunk. In fact, it seems to be riding higher. And chafing a bit.

If it is really impossible to build a boat out of a collapsed star, you should be able to fail to do that in a lab.

Besides, "consensus" starts with "con". Obviously anyone who claims consensus is conning you.

Look. The debate is over.

 

[barfo]

Look. The debate is over.

People who say the debate is over are lying, because they are afraid if they speak out they'll be destroyed (but not literally), and squashed. Possibly by a boat made from very dense material.

barfo

 

[Minstrel]

People who say the debate is over are lying, because they are afraid if they speak out they'll be destroyed (but not literally), and squashed. Possibly by a boat made from very dense material.

You poor fellow. Don't you realize you've been destroyed? I destroyed you by letting you publish your thoughts here in this thread.

 

[barfo]

You poor fellow. Don't you realize you've been destroyed? I destroyed you by letting you publish your thoughts here in this thread.

But... but... I have a graph!

barfo

 

[Minstrel]

But... but... I have a graph!

Which is clearly contradicted by this one. Please take note of the direction of the trend:

 

[barfo]

Which is clearly contradicted by this one. Please take note of the direction of the trend:

If you expand the scale of the x- and y- axis of your graph by a factor of 100,000,000,000,000, you cannot even see the letters "OMG!!". Therefore they do not exist.

barfo

 

[Minstrel]

If you expand the scale of the x- and y- axis of your graph by a factor of 100,000,000,000,000, you cannot even see the letters "OMG!!". Therefore they do not exist.

There is no x- and y-axis.

 

[barfo]

There is no x- and y-axis.

I have a 98-page report from Dr. Lyman Shalbot, DVM, that shows, via meta-analysis, that they do indeed exist. He submitted this report to Congress to be included in the Health Care Reform act, but it was not included. Dr. Shalbot knows a bit about health care, as he was the first to develop penile implants for guinea pigs.

barfo

 

[Minstrel]

I have a 98-page report from Dr. Lyman Shalbot, DVM, that shows, via meta-analysis, that they do indeed exist. He submitted this report to Congress to be included in the Health Care Reform act, but it was not included. Dr. Shalbot knows a bit about health care, as he was the first to develop penile implants for guinea pigs.

Dr. Shalbot also rationed those penile implants. That's why rich hamsters pretty much without exception go to Monaco, where a healthy culture of innovation allows them to get penile implants at will.

 

[barfo]

Dr. Shalbot also rationed those penile implants. That's why rich hamsters pretty much without exception go to Monaco, where a healthy culture of innovation allows them to get penile implants at will.

Hamsters, sure. Hamsters have always gone to Monaco. We are talking about guinea pigs here. Guinea pigs are taxed to death (33% increase!) and can't afford trips abroad. But they can just go to the emergency room to get an implant, so there is really no problem. Emergency room trips are paid for by the emergency room fairy, not the taxpayers. There is no reason guinea pigs should be required to have health insurance.

barfo

 

[Minstrel]

Hamsters, sure. Hamsters have always gone to Monaco. We are talking about guinea pigs here. Guinea pigs are taxed to death (33% increase!) and can't afford trips abroad. But they can just go to the emergency room to get an implant, so there is really no problem. Emergency room trips are paid for by the emergency room fairy, not the taxpayers. There is no reason guinea pigs should be required to have health insurance.

I'm pretty sure guinea pigs and hamsters are the same thing. At least, it's my theory that they are. And that's what good science is, having theories to challenge what "the establishment" says.

Besides, 33% isn't even a whole number...it's less than 1. If you had 33% of a heart, you'd die. It's just not very much, so how can you claim a .33 increase in taxes is "taxed to death?"

 

[barfo]

I'm pretty sure guinea pigs and hamsters are the same thing. At least, it's my theory that they are. And that's what good science is, having theories to challenge what "the establishment" says.

Nonsense. Good science also involves a graph, and an appeal to a marginally qualified expert. You have to have all three legs of the stool sample.

Besides, 33% isn't even a whole number...it's less than 1. If you had 33% of a heart, you'd die. It's just not very much, so how can you claim a .33 increase in taxes is "taxed to death?"

You have a good point here, so I am going to ignore it. Look over there! Fascists!

barfo

 

[Minstrel]

This is for barfo:


http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2009/07/22/NSCE18P9VH.DTL

11 Things: Guinea pigs vs. hamsters
Michelle Broder Van Dyke

Thursday, July 23, 2009

On Friday, Disney releases "G-Force," its 3-D movie about a government program training guinea pigs to work in espionage. Commonly thought of as furry and cute but mundane pets for 5-year-olds, guinea pigs are often mistaken for another humdrum rodent pet, the hamster. We discovered 11 interesting things about hamsters and guinea pigs, which may finally resolve the confusion and even give each a whole new reputation.


1 . Tame the beast: In the early 1500s, European tradesmen marketed guinea pigs as exotic pets for the rich. As for hamsters, in 1930, zoologist Israeli Aharoni captured one male and two female golden hamsters in Syria. This trio is the source of every hamster in captivity today.

2. Eating leftovers: Guinea pigs supplement their diet by coprophagy, a.k.a. eating one's own feces. Hamsters also do this.

3. Big-headed: Hamsters carry food in their cheek pouches, which when full double or even triple their heads in size. Guinea pigs do not have secret hiding spots in their heads.

4. Jon + Kate make a lot: The largest recorded litter of a guinea pig is 17. A litter of Syrian hamsters can be as many as 24.

5. Readymade: Guinea pigs come into the world completely developed. Hamsters are born hairless and blind. It'll take a week before they explore outside the nest.

6. Munchies: Originally, guinea pigs were domesticated in the Andes for consumption. Golden hamsters are sometimes sold as snake snacks.

7. Guinea pig gala: In the Andes, guinea pigs have a festival devoted to them, which includes contests for the biggest, fastest, best-dressed and tastiest furry friend. Some are roasted and skewered, others are dressed in fedoras and frilly skirts. A hamster fest has yet to be founded.

8. Locomotion: Guinea pigs cannot climb but can jump small obstacles. They are excellent swimmers. All hamsters are excellent diggers, building burrows with multiple entrances and many chambers.

9. Lab rats: Since guinea pigs are commonly used as test subjects, the expression "to become a human guinea pig" developed. Hamsters are also used to test cosmetics and other products, but apparently no one cares enough to coin the term "to become a human hamster."

10. Cannibalism: Female hamsters will eat a male hamster if he tries to mate with her when she's not in heat. Hamsters will also eat their own babies as a survival tactic. It is uncommon for guinea pigs to eat their own kind.

11. The fame game: JFK had pet hamsters named Debbie and Billie. Theodore Roosevelt had five pet guinea pigs, including ones named Adm. Dewey Jr., Fighting Bob Evans and Father O'Grady.

- Michelle Broder Van Dyke, 96hours@sfchronicle.com

 

[barfo]

Joseph Goebbels, head of propaganda for Hitler. Yes, I named my hamster after a Nazi. Why? Because
a. He's evil. He bites all the time. I have to wear heavy leather gardening gloves to handle him.
b. He's blonde/aryan. He's even got red eyes -- super evil!

It's clear that Obama is a hamster. It all fits.

barfo

 

[Minstrel]

It's clear that Obama is a hamster. It all fits.

Why are you smearing hamsters, barfo? Is it because you, an anonymous poster going by the name barfo, can't refute what these hamsters are saying? Is that it, "barfo?"

"barfo"

 

[barfo]

Why are you smearing hamsters, barfo? Is it because you, an anonymous poster going by the name barfo, can't refute what these hamsters are saying? Is that it, "barfo?"

"barfo"

Look, one of us knows more about rodents. If you want to believe it is you, that's fine.

barfo

 

[Minstrel]

Look, one of us knows more about rodents. If you want to believe it is you, that's fine.

I'm not the one tossing insults, "barfo." But I understand...you're not really in this debate, you're just here for comic relief. That seems to be your role, Producer.

"barfo"

 

[barfo]

I'm not the one tossing insults, "barfo." But I understand...you're not really in this debate, you're just here for comic relief. That seems to be your role, Producer.

"barfo"

I've forwarded your comments to a friend of mine on the police squad.

barfo

 

[Minstrel]

I've forwarded your comments to a friend of mine on the police squad.

You can do what you want. It's not my job to explain to you how speciation works. Go do some research on it and get back to me. I worked in this field for many years, worked with the best and brightest in the field and I can tell you that you're wrong. But I'm not going to waste my time teaching you.

 

[barfo]

You can do what you want. It's not my job to explain to you how speciation works. Go do some research on it and get back to me. I worked in this field for many years, worked with the best and brightest in the field and I can tell you that you're wrong. But I'm not going to waste my time teaching you.

That's fine. Your assertions that you know better are good enough for me. I don't expect you to back up your claims with data, after all, that would be doing my research for me.

barfo

 

[TradeNurkicNow]

Oh my god this is the most hilarious thing I've ever read on so many levels.

 

[Rodolfo]

Actually, surprisingly that isn't the case. You can, and people do, make concrete boats, and they float.

barfo