Funny Farting in public

[BigGameDamian]

 

[Shaboid]

My favorite move is the elevator fart right before I am about to get off on my floor.

 

[rasheedfan2005]

The other day i farted in the staff locker room on the way out. It was rancid. I think i had tostadas with refried beans and spicy red salsa. A co worker walked in through the door as i left. I just heard "GOOD LORD" as he ran out. I played it off like it had been there when i entered. Pro shit.

 

[Fez Hammersticks]

 

[HomerLovesKoolAid]

BEST. THREAD. EVER.

 

[PDXFonz]

The other day i farted in the staff locker room on the way out. It was rancid. I think i had tostadas with refried beans and spicy red salsa. A co worker walked in through the door as i left. I just heard "GOOD LORD" as he ran out. I played it off like it had been there when i entered. Pro shit.

You weren't fooling anyone!

 

[SlyPokerCat]

I never fart in public.

I'll shit in public though. And bury it in a sandbox.

 

[Jade Falcon]

I never fart in public.

I'll shit in public though. And bury it in a sandbox.

You the real G, bruh.

 

[ripcityboy]

To honestly tell you the truth, I am more offended from the stuff I see on the average person's social media account.

"Hi, I'm Joe Generic and here is my wife Dorthy and and our four fat dipshit kids. Here's the time we fed sushi with mustard to some Harbor Seals!"

I could take the average SPD fart over having to watch that shit.

 

[Dougnsalem]

This needs a poll. How many of you have tried to squeeze one off, and ended up shitting your pants, and are man enough to admit it. Once here, but I expect it to happen more as I get older. I should have known better too- it was right after getting back from a camping trip....

(it doesn't count if you are an old fart, and have to wear Depends every day....)

 

[Jade Falcon]

This needs a poll. How many of you have tried to squeeze one off, and ended up shitting your pants, and are man enough to admit it. Once here, but I expect it to happen more as I get older. I should have known better too- it was right after getting back from a camping trip....

(it doesn't count if you are an old fart, and have to wear Depends every day....)

Guilty. Thankfully, I was at home when it happened. But it was no less humiliating. It was the day I learned I needed to cut back on the fiber I was taking.

 

[Dougnsalem]

SPD???

 

[trailblazer18]

My best poo incident in gchat story form (I am Tom, I lived in China at the time):

Tom: dude
Hee: sup sup
Tom: i have the worst or greatest or strangest story ever
about myself
Hee: haha let's hear it
Tom: so about 1.5 hours ago i was in my bathroom taking a leak and farting at the same time....something i do on a daily basis
and i pushed a little on one of the farts..........
and low and behold!!!!
something extra in my pants
Hee: hahaha yes!!!
Tom: so i stand frozen for about 5 seconds
turn and sit on the toilet and take my shorts and boxers off, but the little guy managed to get to the inside of my shorts not just boxers
and i seemed to have just a heck of a time whipping myself after i went
i felt like i had poop all over
anyways, i wash my clothes and everything is fine
but for some reason i still smelt poo
so i smelt my fingers and washed my hands again
didn't seem to make it go away
then i look at my shoes....yeah, some poo managed to fall on my shoe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hee: HAHAHAHAHA
Tom: this was like an hour later
ridiculous
Hee: that is awesome
Tom: dude i can't believe it really happened
Hee: where they solid nuggets? or like, drips of soft-serve?
Tom: well i have been pretty loose lately
it wasn't much that got out
but it was like a nugget with some melted chocolate on the outside. so everything it touched it turned to poo
Hee: oh man
Tom: so i thought i would share that with you since i was home alone and could only enjoy it myself
Hee: thanks for sharing, haha
you should write a story and send it to the TIP list
Tom: maybe