OT FATHER MAKES DAUGHTER WALK IN COLD WINTER WEATHER

[riverman]

I don't think taking keys away from her would have the same impact it did on your son.

my son never bullied anyone to my knowledge...if he did I'd take him straight to the kid's house and make him apologize to the kid and the parents..the girl could learn to enjoy walking though and stave off obesity

 

[TorturedBlazerFan]

Every poster so far agrees with this punishment.

My oldest is only 4 but I find one of the hardest “decisions” is how do I a) make sure she understands what she is being punished for, and b) what is the appropriate punishment. Whats excessive, what isnt enough.
Count me among the parents who definitely believe I should discipline my kids for bad behavior, but I hope like crazy its never over the line, its never done because Im just mad at her, its out of wanting what I believe is best for her. When Im wrong I want to be the first to tell her I was wrong.

All that said if he felt this was a punishment she deserved I dont believe it really crossed any lines.

 

[Lanny]

This seems like a non-story.

Walking is now what, torture? difficult to do? embarrassing? Not seeing this as punishment or correction for bullying.

She needs her ass whipped.

I had a second cousin who was a published PhD in psychology. He taught that physical punishment was wrong.
When I was a small child, my father used to beat me on occasion. Later he came to his senses and also taught me that physical punishment of a child was wrong. I once spanked a niece for misbehaving and to this day I regret it.
I'm a convert, physical punishment of a child is wrong. I'd reserve physical punishment for adults that I catch doing serious wrong. e.g. I almost tore a guy apart when I caught him with my ex wife. Probably should have reserved the physical punishment for her.
Children are growing and learning. They learn violence is okay when they are beaten, spanked or slapped.
Please don't spank your grandchildren.

 

[TorturedBlazerFan]

I had a second cousin who was a published PhD in psychology. He taught that physical punishment was wrong.
When I was a small child, my father used to beat me on occasion. Later he came to his senses and also taught me that physical punishment of a child was wrong. I once spanked a niece for misbehaving and to this day I regret it.
I'm a convert, physical punishment of a child is wrong. I'd reserve physical punishment for adults that I catch doing serious wrong. e.g. I almost tore a guy apart when I caught him with my ex wife. Probably should have reserved the physical punishment for her.
Children are growing and learning. They learn violence is okay when they are beaten, spanked or slapped.
Please don't spank your grandchildren.

I was spanked a few times as a child, 4 that remember each time I deserved it was explained pretty well why it was happening. All 4 times it worked in straightening out my behavior in fact if someone came along when I was 20 and whipped me pretty good that might have saved me some stupid decisions lol.

I agree you shouldnt beat your kids especially young kids that dont really even understand what their in trouble for. Punishment and discipline is about correcting behavior. You want them to associate doing the “wrong” thing with something negative. All kids are different figuring out what works for a particular child can be extremely hard to do.

Unless something clearly jumps over the line I have a hard time telling people how to parent their kids, they know the kid, the situation, the details better than I do. I think a lot of the anti spanking stuff came from parents, and dads especially who came off aggressive and angry and sometimes drunk too. Thats not disciplining your children thats abuse. Thats you’re having a bad day and taking it out on your kids, in my opinion thats crappy parenting.

 

[Lanny]

I was spanked a few times as a child, 4 that remember each time I deserved it was explained pretty well why it was happening. All 4 times it worked in straightening out my behavior in fact if someone came along when I was 20 and whipped me pretty good that might have saved me some stupid decisions lol.

I agree you shouldnt beat your kids especially young kids that dont really even understand what their in trouble for. Punishment and discipline is about correcting behavior. You want them to associate doing the “wrong” thing with something negative. All kids are different figuring out what works for a particular child can be extremely hard to do.

Unless something clearly jumps over the line I have a hard time telling people how to parent their kids, they know the kid, the situation, the details better than I do. I think a lot of the anti spanking stuff came from parents, and dads especially who came off aggressive and angry and sometimes drunk too. Thats not disciplining your children thats abuse. Thats you’re having a bad day and taking it out on your kids, in my opinion thats crappy parenting.

Psychologists agree that it does not correct misbehavior but rather teaches children the value of violence.
https://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/04/spanking.aspx

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/what-science-says-and-doesn-t-about-spanking/

 

[PtldPlatypus]

I confess that as a young parent, I didn't do a very good job of avoiding the whole "not disciplining while angry" thing. I am fortunate that my children still respect me, because I look back on some of my parenting errors/flaws and am very disappointed in many of my choices.

 

[Lanny]

I confess that as a young parent, I didn't do a very good job of avoiding the whole "not disciplining while angry" thing. I am fortunate that my children still respect me, because I look back on some of my parenting errors/flaws and am very disappointed in many of my choices.

Nobody is perfect. I believe that only one was perfect.
If I could take back all the bad things I ever did, I'd do it in a heartbeat and probably have gone into the priesthood.

 

[TorturedBlazerFan]

Psychologists agree that it does not correct misbehavior but rather teaches children the value of violence.
https://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/04/spanking.aspx

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/what-science-says-and-doesn-t-about-spanking/

The new analysis also did not completely overcome the lumping problem: It considered slapping and hitting children anywhere on the body as synonymous with spanking but these actions might have distinct effects. Some research also suggests that the effects of spanking differ depending on the reasons parents spank, how frequently they do so and how old children are at the time—so the conclusion from the meta-analysis that spanking itself is dangerous may be overly simplistic. “I think it’s irresponsible to make exclusive statements one way or another,” Ferguson says.

This is from that article. And this is my point. To me discipline and punishment is about the heart of it. Is my heart in it to help them and to love them or is my heart just pissed off and cranky.
Like I said I'd never advocate for hurting a child.

 

[dviss1]

I think it's good parenting.

Walk in the cold if you wanna act like Trump.

 

[TorturedBlazerFan]

I think it's good parenting.

Walk in the cold if you wanna act like Trump.

Well I laughed. heh.

 

[dviss1]

I confess that as a young parent, I didn't do a very good job of avoiding the whole "not disciplining while angry" thing. I am fortunate that my children still respect me, because I look back on some of my parenting errors/flaws and am very disappointed in many of my choices.

I normally do not spank. But, Si has gotten spanked before. I hate doing it and am not proud of a society that says hitting children is acceptable.

But then he lied to me...

Jussayin... I feel you. You have to have that self talk, ya know...

"He's only 9... Calm down..."
" Remember, you're raising a future husband and father... "
"You'll only make him afraid..."

 

[barfo]

I have no respect for any parent who spanks their child these days.

People need to realize its 2018. We have tasers now!

barfo

 

[PtldPlatypus]

I normally do not spank. But, Si has gotten spanked before. I hate doing it and am not proud of a society that says hitting children is acceptable.

But then he lied to me...

Jussayin... I feel you. You have to have that self talk, ya know...

"He's only 9... Calm down..."
" Remember, you're raising a future husband and father... "
"You'll only make him afraid..."

I do often remind Tanner, "I'm making a concerted effort to remain calm, despite the disrespect you've shown by..." or other statements of that nature. Something to highlight the fact that it is possible to be frustrated and angry, but not allow that frustration or anger to control your responses. 'Cause yeah, EVERY moment with your kid is an opportunity to model wisdom or foolishness. I've heard many times that kids learn significantly more from what they see you do than what they hear you say. Which is too bad, 'cause what they hear me say is GOLD!!

And yeah, I've had to apologize to my kids for inappropriate parental responses. Nothing more humbling.

 

[dviss1]

"I'm making a concerted effort to remain calm, despite the disrespect you've shown by..."

I LOVE THAT!!

I'm going to start using that one.

 

[riverman]

My favorite was ...son, you have a choice..you can deal with me or your mother about this

 

[Natebishop3]

Just send them to the gulag.