Lifting seat up after crapping?

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Ronan said:
Kid sounds like a douche.
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Actually, he sounds nothing at all like a douche. A douche gets to go inside vaginas, and this twerp doesn't.
 
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So glad I don't have to deal with this sort of shit. I might live in a smaller apt, in a shadier part of town, but I don't have to share my toilet with anyone else.
 
It's a campus apartment, so he has as much right as I do to be here. He was assigned to this room so I can't throw him out. The hall would have to throw him out and to do that he would have to be caught doing something. He does have knives and beer in his room, but I don't want to call him out on that. The only thing I could get him on is being unsanitary if he doesn't clean up the urine. He is totally the type of kid who would try and go tell on me, but I did nothing wrong so I sort of want him too just to see the look on the hall directors face when he hears the story.

We have yet to speak to each other since the argument, I will inform you of any developments in the "case of the shit-and-lifter" story.
 
Just be careful. Dude might spit in your food or play other pranks on you if he's really pissed off.
 
I have this trimmer in the back of my bathroom cupboard that I NEVER use. It's in the very back. Today when I woke up, the trimmer was in the very front of my cupboard and the setting was at a different setting then its ever been at.

Also, my roommates never lock the doors because my friend Erik always forgets his keys. If we lock the door we have to come and let him in. Today it was locked... the weird kid was the last to leave.

He is trying to get back at us, I'm going to strike him in the head.
 
I can't even comprehend this. He couldn't have grown up with a Mother in the house.

Put cellophane over the bowl so it comes back at him.
 
That guy is raging me and I don't even live with him. Punch that guy in the face.
 
Part of me doesn't want to mess with him because its just too easy. It's not even fair. If I were to put something around the toilet he would pee and then just not clean it up.

Oh, and he grew up with a mother and a sister. Very close family. He just thinks if its all guys then its proper to leave the seat up at all times. He has still yet to say anything to me lol.
 
Sounds like he's a bit controlling. I could understand it not being how you're used to, but dude..clean up your piss. Put down the seat. If anything, it's gross that you leave the lid UP. Unless you have little kids (who sometimes have to go and aren't able to hold it in all the way), who wants to see the toilet bowl?

but seriously, the guy should just get over himself.

I'm telling you, if you find out he's using something of yours, or whatever, sabotage it. If he's using your razor, buy a new one ( don't tell him) and put some dried up food coloring in the blades so it looks like he's bleeding. OR, better yet, get some dye that will mark on his face that he's using your razor. Or, the old tried and true method....put laxatives in his food.
 
dpc said:
Part of me doesn't want to mess with him because its just too easy. It's not even fair. If I were to put something around the toilet he would pee and then just not clean it up.

Oh, and he grew up with a mother and a sister. Very close family. He just thinks if its all guys then its proper to leave the seat up at all times. He has still yet to say anything to me lol.
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You're coming off as a bit of a prissy nag, IMO. Not that it's a bad thing, but you're in college living with some dudes.

I lived in a frat house with 50 guys and 25 toilets. I guess I didn't notice who left up the toilet seat. I always sprayed the ass frame before cutting loose with a deuce, though. I don't recall ever worrying about the can, even when I lived in a basement apartment my senior year with 3 other guys. We actually had a spider in our can that we treated as a part of the house for a few weeks.
 
you should jerk him off in the middle of the night and put the footage online! That will show him!
:sherlock:
 
PapaG said:
I lived in a frat house with 50 guys and 25 toilets. I guess I didn't notice who left up the toilet seat. I always sprayed the ass frame before cutting loose with a deuce, though.
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Never heard of anyone peeing on the seat before they sat down on it themselves. That's truly perverse. No wonder you are so angry all the time.

barfo
 
barfo said:
Never heard of anyone peeing on the seat before they sat down on it themselves. That's truly perverse. No wonder you are so angry all the time.

barfo
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I sprayed it with 409, you pervert. Kudos for being a sick fuck, though. It was funny.
 
PapaG said:
You're coming off as a bit of a prissy nag, IMO. Not that it's a bad thing, but you're in college living with some dudes.

I lived in a frat house with 50 guys and 25 toilets. I guess I didn't notice who left up the toilet seat. I always sprayed the ass frame before cutting loose with a deuce, though. I don't recall ever worrying about the can, even when I lived in a basement apartment my senior year with 3 other guys. We actually had a spider in our can that we treated as a part of the house for a few weeks.
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Did I read it wrong? I was under the impression that the other guy was pissed because DPC leaves the seat DOWN and the guy is too lazy to lift the seat up to pee?
 
PapaG said:
You're coming off as a bit of a prissy nag, IMO. Not that it's a bad thing, but you're in college living with some dudes.

I lived in a frat house with 50 guys and 25 toilets. I guess I didn't notice who left up the toilet seat. I always sprayed the ass frame before cutting loose with a deuce, though. I don't recall ever worrying about the can, even when I lived in a basement apartment my senior year with 3 other guys. We actually had a spider in our can that we treated as a part of the house for a few weeks.
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Nice slang, bro. Wanna hold me up for a keg stand?
 
A guy I used to work with was constantly having arguments with his wife about leaving the seat up. One summer, when she took the kids to their beach house, he had a urinal installed next to the toilet at their apartment. Problem solved.
 
Put a spring hinge on the toilet seat that makes the seat always flip up to the up position when there is nobody sitting on it. You'll probably scrape some feces off your ass the first couple times you stand up to wipe, but I bet you'll get the technique down. Or get a U-shaped seat to avoid that issue.

I've always wondered why public toilets don't do this. Especially on the toilet nearest the men's room door, which gets most of the standing-piss action when the urinals are crowded.
 
mook said:
Put a spring hinge on the toilet seat that makes the seat always flip up to the up position when there is nobody sitting on it. You'll probably scrape some feces off your ass the first couple times you stand up to wipe, but I bet you'll get the technique down. Or get a U-shaped seat to avoid that issue.

I've always wondered why public toilets don't do this. Especially on the toilet nearest the men's room door, which gets most of the standing-piss action when the urinals are crowded.
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I can't believe I'm repping a post in this thread, but I am. Spring-hinge--brilliant!
 
PapaG, if you are referring to him being mad at me because we leave the seat down after we crap is him messing with me, you are wrong.

I have no idea how I am being prissy? I would think he is the one being prissy because he is complaining that we don't lift he seat up after we shit? And you forget, I am the only one typing this, but their are 2 other guys in this apartment that are fighting him on this too. It's not me vs him, its 3 vs him on this issue.
 
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