OT My Sis Is An Angry Lib

[Lanny]

And yet you use a hate filled name towards her.

I guess we all have our own way of showing "love" for family members.

I love my wife so much that I call her asshole. Oh people, people, not really.

 

[calvin natt]

You know, honestly, I can see why your sister is "angry" (besides being correct about being angry when GW Bush was president).

I'd be angry if a sibling of mine would say things of a political nature, and then when someone tries to respond to it, they'd ignore it and act like they never said anything. Kind of like how you had your thread about listening to why people are against Donald Trump, but you basically ended your posts by saying "listen I'm open to hearing why you guys don't like him, but no matter how damming your evidence, I still think you're wrong about him".

it's being intellectually dishonest.

I was going to write this very same sentiment...but thought what's the point. Glad you did.

 

[ABM]

You know, honestly, I can see why your sister is "angry" (besides being correct about being angry when GW Bush was president).

I'd be angry if a sibling of mine would say things of a political nature, and then when someone tries to respond to it, they'd ignore it and act like they never said anything. Kind of like how you had your thread about listening to why people are against Donald Trump, but you basically ended your posts by saying "listen I'm open to hearing why you guys don't like him, but no matter how damming your evidence, I still think you're wrong about him".

it's being intellectually dishonest.

You're absolutely wrong on all three accounts:

1) Due to the history of my sister's acrimonious behavior at family events, coupled with her constantly wanting to engage me and other family members in political debate (eventually turning into her completley flying off the handle), I've chosen to refrain from conversing with her on those subjects. I've simply asked if we could enjoy each other on SO many other levels and agree to disagree regarding our political viewpoints. She's working on that but still struggles some. She uses FB as a venting post and, generally speaking, that's all she uses it for.

2) I was genuinely interested in hearing why all y'all hated Trump so much, but became weary of all the personal insults coming my way. Go back and look again. On that note, I even related in at least one political thread that if John Kasich were running against Trump, and had a legitimate chance to win, I'd most likely vote for him. I also think I related my value points, if only one, quite succinctly.

3) Completely incorrect assertion.

 

[calvin natt]

You're absolutely wrong on all three accounts:

1) Due to the history of my sister's acrimonious behavior at family events, coupled with her constantly wanting to engage me and other family members in political debate (eventually turning into her completley flying off the handle), I've chosen to refrain from conversing with her on those subjects. I've simply asked if we could enjoy each other on SO many other levels and agree to disagree regarding our political viewpoints. She's working on that but still struggles some. She uses FB as a venting post and, generally speaking, that's all she uses it for.

2) I was genuinely interested in hearing why all y'all hated Trump so much, but became weary of all the personal insults coming my way. Go back and look again. On that note, I even related in at least one political thread that if John Kasich were running against Trump, and had a legitimate chance to win, I'd most likely vote for him. I also think I related my value points, if only one, quite succinctly.

3) Completely incorrect assertion.

I am not going to re-read all 10 pages of your "Im willing to listen" thread, but i just looked a about half of it and dont see a single personal insult. I think people tried to intentionally give their reasons about not liking or trusting Trump without insults or attacking, because someone actually went out of their way to acknowledge being open and appreciated the thread. It felt like no matter what anyone wrote, it made no difference and not once did you say anything like "yeah, that makes sense or i get it". It was a waste of everyone's time.

 

[SlyPokerDog]

I am not going to re-read all 10 pages of your "Im willing to listen" thread, but i just looked a about half of it and dont see a single personal insult. I think people tried to intentionally give their reasons about not liking or trusting Trump without insults or attacking, because someone actually went out of their way to acknowledge you and appreciated the thread. It felt like no matter what anyone wrote, it made no difference and not once did you say anything like "yeah, that makes sense or i get it". It was a waste of everyone's time.

I just reread it and you did have some posts that pushed the limit. But I didn't see any outright personal insults at ABM.

 

[riverman]

She uses FB as a venting post

This would be my step one in family anger management...dump Facebook and encourage her to do the same...it's basically like letting the Jerry Springer show into your life to use Facebook in many cases....I love my older sister but really don't want her facebook crap in my life....so I left ….the other tool for the family dinner is just not to respond to political stuff.....I like to nod and say..."interesting, how about them Blazers?" That or up your standup comedy skills...make her laugh about something...politics are serious when they are taken too seriously...a little humor goes a long ways..around here el presidente and I have really polarizing views about Trump but are friends who joke about him and it keeps it healthy, unlike some other folks who take serious up to stupid levels.

 

[ABM]

….the other tool for the family dinner is just not to respond to political stuff.....I like to nod and say..."interesting, how about them Blazers?" That or up your standup comedy skills...make her laugh about something...politics are serious when they are taken too seriously...a little humor goes a long ways..around here el presidente and I have really polarizing views about Trump but are friends who joke about him and it keeps it healthy, unlike some other folks who take serious up to stupid levels.

Exactly. I shared this in one of my initial posts within this thread:

"As mentioned, I refuse to talk about politics, period, with her. I want to enjoy her as my sister...as a person. She just has so much hate for Trump, she can't help herself venting to me. I'll absolutely listen, but I've since refrained from response. I ask if we could just change the subject and talk about the beautiful trails near The Dalles. I totally understand she (and most of you) hates Trump. Seriously, though, do we really want to destroy relationships over him? Chances are, he won't last past next year. Conversely, (family/friends) relationships are for a lifetime."

 

[calvin natt]

I just reread it and you did have some posts that pushed the limit. But I didn't see any outright personal insults at ABM.

Which? Was it “if you don’t think Trump is racist you might be racist? If so, I’m ok with that.

 

[SlyPokerDog]

Which? Was it “if you don’t think Trump is racist you might be racist? If so, I’m ok with that.

Yes that one.

 

[Lanny]

Exactly. I shared this in one of my initial posts within this thread:

"As mentioned, I refuse to talk about politics, period, with her. I want to enjoy her as my sister...as a person. She just has so much hate for Trump, she can't help herself venting to me. I'll absolutely listen, but I've since refrained from response. I ask if we could just change the subject and talk about the beautiful trails near The Dalles. I totally understand she (and most of you) hates Trump. Seriously, though, do we really want to destroy relationships over him? Chances are, he won't last past next year. Conversely, (family/friends) relationships are for a lifetime."

Trump will come and go but your sister is your sister forever.

 

[UncleCliffy'sDaddy]

My dad’s side of the family is/was (most of them are now gone) very political and they loved to argue, mostly for the sake of arguing. For them it was “quality family time”. But for some of us it got very old (especially those of us who were public employees) and it really started to put a damper on family events. One uncle in particular, great guy that he was, was especially vocal and conservative. My wife and I would host all my dad’s siblings for dad’s birthday party every year after my mother died and after the first one was loudly dominated by the zealots on both sides of the political spectrum within the family, I started posting a set of rules at the front door for every party after that. The first rule was that discussion was welcome but politics and religion were to be left at the front door. And if they could not follow the rules they would be asked to leave. A few had a hard time taking me seriously but the majority laughed and wondered why no one had thought of that solution before. Every party from then on, a good time was had by all and never an angry word was said or heard by anyone. I guess my point is......set some ground rules, make sure expectations (and priorities) are clear and then hold guests accountable. If they don’t like it, then that is THEIR problem, not yours. Family events are supposed to be enjoyable for everyone, not an arena for the self righteous to make asses of one’s selves or to ruin everyone else’s good time......

 

[TorturedBlazerFan]

My dad’s side of the family is/was (most of them are now gone) very political and they loved to argue, mostly for the sake of arguing. For them it was “quality family time”. But for some of us it got very old (especially those of us who were public employees) and it really started to put a damper on family events. One uncle in particular, great guy that he was, was especially vocal and conservative. My wife and I would host all my dad’s siblings for dad’s birthday party every year after my mother died and after the first one was loudly dominated by the zealots on both sides of the political spectrum within the family, I started posting a set of rules at the front door for every party after that. The first rule was that discussion was welcome but politics and religion were to be left at the front door. And if they could not follow the rules they would be asked to leave. A few had a hard time taking me seriously but the majority laughed and wondered why no one had thought of that solution before. Every party from then on, a good time was had by all and never an angry word was said or heard by anyone. I guess my point is......set some ground rules, make sure expectations (and priorities) are clear and then hold guests accountable. If they don’t like it, then that is THEIR problem, not yours. Family events are supposed to be enjoyable for everyone, not an arena for the self righteous to make asses of one’s selves or to ruin everyone else’s good time......

Family events are supposed to be enjoyable? what..... lol.

 

[Hobbesarable]

My dad’s side of the family is/was (most of them are now gone) very political and they loved to argue, mostly for the sake of arguing. For them it was “quality family time”. But for some of us it got very old (especially those of us who were public employees) and it really started to put a damper on family events. One uncle in particular, great guy that he was, was especially vocal and conservative. My wife and I would host all my dad’s siblings for dad’s birthday party every year after my mother died and after the first one was loudly dominated by the zealots on both sides of the political spectrum within the family, I started posting a set of rules at the front door for every party after that. The first rule was that discussion was welcome but politics and religion were to be left at the front door. And if they could not follow the rules they would be asked to leave. A few had a hard time taking me seriously but the majority laughed and wondered why no one had thought of that solution before. Every party from then on, a good time was had by all and never an angry word was said or heard by anyone. I guess my point is......set some ground rules, make sure expectations (and priorities) are clear and then hold guests accountable. If they don’t like it, then that is THEIR problem, not yours. Family events are supposed to be enjoyable for everyone, not an arena for the self righteous to make asses of one’s selves or to ruin everyone else’s good time......

I did exactly the same thing when I got my first place. Except these rules applied to every day. I wanted a stress free environment where I could relax and enjoy life.

So, I too posted my rules. My house, my rules. Nearly everyone complied and I asked those to leave who would not comply. Soon enough my friends and family knew I was not joking. It was liberating.

 

[TorturedBlazerFan]

I did exactly the same thing when I got my first place. Except these rules applied to every day. I wanted a stress free environment where I could relax and enjoy life.

So, I too posted my rules. My house, my rules. Nearly everyone complied and I asked those to leave who would not comply. Soon enough my friends and family knew I was not joking. It was liberating.

I solve it by just not having people over lol.

 

[Hobbesarable]

I solve it by just not having people over lol.

Yes, I can see how that will work. Haha

 

[Lanny]

I solve it by just not having people over lol.

Me? I bought a cabin deep in the woods. Chop wood for cooking fuel and heat. Carry water from the well for drinking, cooking and homemade beer making. Can't lug enough for bathing. This is an additional factor in keeping people away. It's a little complicated when I get sick or break a bone. I do a lot of reading by the light of the fire, reading tea leaves that is. Being out of touch with civilization means no reading matter. I go to the general store 25 miles away to get something to read once a month and that's when I get my monthly bath.Gotta stay sharp for the babes.

 

[ABM]

......The first rule was that discussion was welcome but politics and religion were to be left at the front door. And if they could not follow the rules they would be asked to leave.......

Love it!!