Big Aaron
DYC Working Class Hero
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2007
- Messages
- 572
- Likes
- 0
- Points
- 16
Here's a couple to start you off:
My mate decides that everywhere is a toilet when he's pissed. After a heavy night out, he went to the kebab shop, got his large doner and walked home. Last thing he remembers the next morning is leaving the pub at about 11.30pm. He wakes up on the couch with this weird smell in his living room. He stands up and focuses and his girlfriend is standing at the door, mouth wide open in shock and staring at the home entertainment stand (TV, Stereo, DVD etc). He looks over and when he got home, thinking he was in the toilet, he'd pissed all over the TV and stereo and shit on the floor in front of the TV.
His missus refused to speak to him for four days and he had to clean up his own piss and shit with a raging hangover.
My mates and I were walking home pissed-up from a party and we found one of those massive cardboard tubes from the middle of rolls of carpets. We picked it up and were throwing it at each other, shouting down it etc. Anyway, we came to a big, wide road that was empty apart from 3 cars and decided to have a giant roll javelin contest. My friend Matt couldn't throw it like a javelin because he was too short so he threw it like a hammer (spin around and release). Only he span around too many times, got dizzy, halfway through spinning, he threw up all over himself and lobbed the tube and it went through someone's living room window. We all ran off laughing really hard and Matt was still throwing up as he ran. We got about 5 or 6 streets away and stopped running and Matt passed out in the gutter so we had to pick him up and carry him home for about another mile and a half. This was all after a pretty manic party and was absolutely genius. I've never laughed so much.
My mate decides that everywhere is a toilet when he's pissed. After a heavy night out, he went to the kebab shop, got his large doner and walked home. Last thing he remembers the next morning is leaving the pub at about 11.30pm. He wakes up on the couch with this weird smell in his living room. He stands up and focuses and his girlfriend is standing at the door, mouth wide open in shock and staring at the home entertainment stand (TV, Stereo, DVD etc). He looks over and when he got home, thinking he was in the toilet, he'd pissed all over the TV and stereo and shit on the floor in front of the TV.
My mates and I were walking home pissed-up from a party and we found one of those massive cardboard tubes from the middle of rolls of carpets. We picked it up and were throwing it at each other, shouting down it etc. Anyway, we came to a big, wide road that was empty apart from 3 cars and decided to have a giant roll javelin contest. My friend Matt couldn't throw it like a javelin because he was too short so he threw it like a hammer (spin around and release). Only he span around too many times, got dizzy, halfway through spinning, he threw up all over himself and lobbed the tube and it went through someone's living room window. We all ran off laughing really hard and Matt was still throwing up as he ran. We got about 5 or 6 streets away and stopped running and Matt passed out in the gutter so we had to pick him up and carry him home for about another mile and a half. This was all after a pretty manic party and was absolutely genius. I've never laughed so much.
