Funny Because we really need a laugh right now

[crandc]

This is in no way Blazers related, just about the absurdities of bureaucracy.

I retired about a year ago. For reasons I won't bore you with, most of my savings are about equally divided between two accounts, with a third smaller account, all held by Charles Schwab. It made sense to tap the smallest account first. My financial adviser recently informed me that account was now empty and we would start moving to the larger accounts. But when I got my Schwab statement it showed $.12 still remaining.

Some years ago I wanted to close a checking account, so I cashed it out. Later I got a bank statement with a bunch of fees. I had gone below the free checking amount, then they charged a service fee, there was no money so I got hit with overdraft fees. I went to the bank and told them I had closed the account. I found out simply withdrawing the money doesn't close an account, I needed to actually ask bank to do so. They were nice enough to waive the fees.

So I told my financial adviser that, silly as it sounds, we needed to formally close the account and withdraw the 12 cents. Otherwise when they charged their annual fee I would have insufficient funds. The office contacted Schwab and discovered between the bank statement and that day the account had gained 3 cents and was now worth $.15. Federal income tax is pre-deducted before distribution, so they filed with IRS. I got ten cents and the feds got five cents.

So .... think of how much time was spent by financial adviser, Charles Schwab, the IRS, and me so that I could get a dime transferred to my checking account and the federal government get a nickel. And yet it had to be done to avoid overdraft fees.

 

[CupWizier]

This is in no way Blazers related, just about the absurdities of bureaucracy.

I retired about a year ago. For reasons I won't bore you with, most of my savings are about equally divided between two accounts, with a third smaller account, all held by Charles Schwab. It made sense to tap the smallest account first. My financial adviser recently informed me that account was now empty and we would start moving to the larger accounts. But when I got my Schwab statement it showed $.12 still remaining.

Some years ago I wanted to close a checking account, so I cashed it out. Later I got a bank statement with a bunch of fees. I had gone below the free checking amount, then they charged a service fee, there was no money so I got hit with overdraft fees. I went to the bank and told them I had closed the account. I found out simply withdrawing the money doesn't close an account, I needed to actually ask bank to do so. They were nice enough to waive the fees.

So I told my financial adviser that, silly as it sounds, we needed to formally close the account and withdraw the 12 cents. Otherwise when they charged their annual fee I would have insufficient funds. The office contacted Schwab and discovered between the bank statement and that day the account had gained 3 cents and was now worth $.15. Federal income tax is pre-deducted before distribution, so they filed with IRS. I got ten cents and the feds got five cents.

So .... think of how much time was spent by financial adviser, Charles Schwab, the IRS, and me so that I could get a dime transferred to my checking account and the federal government get a nickel. And yet it had to be done to avoid overdraft fees.

You should have donated that $.15 to the trump wall fundraiser he is doing.

 

[riverman]

This is in no way Blazers related, just about the absurdities of bureaucracy.

I retired about a year ago. For reasons I won't bore you with, most of my savings are about equally divided between two accounts, with a third smaller account, all held by Charles Schwab. It made sense to tap the smallest account first. My financial adviser recently informed me that account was now empty and we would start moving to the larger accounts. But when I got my Schwab statement it showed $.12 still remaining.

Some years ago I wanted to close a checking account, so I cashed it out. Later I got a bank statement with a bunch of fees. I had gone below the free checking amount, then they charged a service fee, there was no money so I got hit with overdraft fees. I went to the bank and told them I had closed the account. I found out simply withdrawing the money doesn't close an account, I needed to actually ask bank to do so. They were nice enough to waive the fees.

So I told my financial adviser that, silly as it sounds, we needed to formally close the account and withdraw the 12 cents. Otherwise when they charged their annual fee I would have insufficient funds. The office contacted Schwab and discovered between the bank statement and that day the account had gained 3 cents and was now worth $.15. Federal income tax is pre-deducted before distribution, so they filed with IRS. I got ten cents and the feds got five cents.

So .... think of how much time was spent by financial adviser, Charles Schwab, the IRS, and me so that I could get a dime transferred to my checking account and the federal government get a nickel. And yet it had to be done to avoid overdraft fees.

my bank had a minimum 1500 dollar balance for free checking accts.....one year I paid my property tax by check on a Friday to Salem and my auto deposit from work was scheduled to be in the bank Monday morning.....the govt cashed my property tax check before the end of the working day on Monday and my check from work didn't get there till the next morning....it made my checking acct balance dip just below the 1500 at the time and they fined me 300 dollars for it.....what a scam! even though for many years my work paycheck was regularly deposited around that time. They profited from the fine print in a tiny window they knew they could use. I eventually changed banks.

 

[crandc]

You should have donated that $.15 to the trump wall fundraiser he is doing.

Maybe my next debate watch party. It might cover one onion.

 

[Lanny]

This is in no way Blazers related, just about the absurdities of bureaucracy.

I retired about a year ago. For reasons I won't bore you with, most of my savings are about equally divided between two accounts, with a third smaller account, all held by Charles Schwab. It made sense to tap the smallest account first. My financial adviser recently informed me that account was now empty and we would start moving to the larger accounts. But when I got my Schwab statement it showed $.12 still remaining.

Some years ago I wanted to close a checking account, so I cashed it out. Later I got a bank statement with a bunch of fees. I had gone below the free checking amount, then they charged a service fee, there was no money so I got hit with overdraft fees. I went to the bank and told them I had closed the account. I found out simply withdrawing the money doesn't close an account, I needed to actually ask bank to do so. They were nice enough to waive the fees.

So I told my financial adviser that, silly as it sounds, we needed to formally close the account and withdraw the 12 cents. Otherwise when they charged their annual fee I would have insufficient funds. The office contacted Schwab and discovered between the bank statement and that day the account had gained 3 cents and was now worth $.15. Federal income tax is pre-deducted before distribution, so they filed with IRS. I got ten cents and the feds got five cents.

So .... think of how much time was spent by financial adviser, Charles Schwab, the IRS, and me so that I could get a dime transferred to my checking account and the federal government get a nickel. And yet it had to be done to avoid overdraft fees.

Something like that happened to me with my Fred Meyer savings account. I opened the account only so I could get a set of crystal glasses. Cool, the account must have been for about $1,000. I withdrew about $700 (I can't recall the exact amounts so you're getting a wag) and that left somewhere around $300. Then I took a job in St. Louis. Okay, now I'm below a $500 threshold and they start charging me a service charge of about $30/mo. I didn't find out until I took another job in Seattle a little over 1 1/2 years later. My account of somewhere around $300 was gone and they never told me about what was going on. It wasn't worth the effort to protest. Fred Meyer sucks. Their savings and loan went out of business, I wonder why. Mismanagement?

 

[CupWizier]

This is in no way Blazers related, just about the absurdities of bureaucracy.
.

I can add a funny story to this thread that happened several years back.

Two of my kids were playing in a big National Soccer tournament in Phoenix Arizona over Presidents Day weekend. Both kids traveled down with their team and because our oldest daughter works for the airlines we fly free pretty much anywhere. We decided to go to the airport and try and catch the flight my son was on as it was leaving at 6:30am. We check in and put on the standby list but the flight ended up not having any seats but I knew the flight to Burbank was pretty open so we go to that gate to check in and then find out that flight was canceled. No problem, the LA flight had some seats but lo and behold with the Burbank cancellation it filled that plane as well. To make matters worse, America West airlines had a huge computer failure that shut down flights all over the US so many people were looking for alternative flights which made it more difficult to fly standby. We then start getting creative and saw that Horizon had a flight to San Jose, California that was pretty open and then we would connect from there. We check in and soon after find out that San Jose is fogged in at the time and what they can do is fly to Redding and then bus the passengers to the Bay area. We decide that's not a good option so I contact my daughter and she suggests flying to Boise and then connecting.

Next stage, we end up boarding the plane to Boise and then in flight I look at the schedules and see that the plane from Boise to LA leaves before we land as my daughter forgot to compensate for the hour time difference. Well, we're heading to Boise so that will be our base to work from. We get off the plane and I hit up a Southwest gate for flight possibilities and she says there are about ready to close the gate but they can get us on the flight to Vegas. She also informs us that it has a stopover in Reno and likely won;t be able to get out of Reno due to the America West issue. We pass. I then talk to a Horizon ticket agent and she says she does the Boise to San Jose to Phoenix flight all the time and it's usually pretty open and she says there are seats available. We had to wait a few hours for the flight and it's now 4:30 in the afternoon but we get on the flight and are headed to San Jose.

Next stage. We land in San Jose and take the bus to the proper terminal to catch the next flight and we get to the terminal with the place completely packed and people sitting on the floor and hardly able to walk. We go to the check in desk and the gal says she can put us on the standby list as she shuffles through at least 6 pages of names on the standby list. At that point I realize we're going nowhere. I call the airlines (yes, at this stage I am even willing to pay) and see when the next available flight is to either LA or Phoenix and she says 3:00pm the next day is the earliest. My wife and I discuss it and she convinces me we can rent a car and drive to LA (mind you, this is now about 11:30pm). My wife thinks we can switch off driving so we can drive straight to LA. So we get the car and head out on the highway towards LA and probably 30 minutes into the drive I see something coming at us out of the corner of my eye and it hits us (seemed like a small deer or possibly coyote). At the same time we get onto a section of road that has been grooved and feels like we have a flat tire so i pull over expecting to change a tire and assess the damage from the animal (i didn't purchase the extra insurance). Lo and behold there is no damage and no flat tire. I look at the clock and it's about 12:30 so we are into the next day and think maybe our luck has changed. I continue driving and we get to Santa Barbara and by that time I am exhausted to I let my wife take over the driving chores. Well not sure if that lasted even 10 minutes before she pulls over and says she is too tired to drive. I pull into a gas station that is closed and plan to sleep a bit, but I was too restless so while my wife was sleeping, I continue the journey.

Next stage. We get into LA and I end up missing the LAX exit which caused about a 10 minute delay but we get into LAX and drop off the rental car and go to check in for the flight. Of course once again because of the American West fiasco flights are booked. I then end up purchasing tickets to Phoenix but the flight doesn't leave till about 1pm. I decide to check on an earlier flight to see if they have any available seats and they put us on standby. They begin calling names and I turnaround and my wife is nowhere to be found and ask the ticket agent to hold on a second while I retrieve my wife. I find her wandering down the corridor and rush back to the gate and we are told to go ahead and board. My wife gets on the plane and I need to gate check our bags and after doing so, walk down the ramp to board the plane. I get in there and see my wife sitting in the front row smiling and the flight attendant tells me to go look for a seat. I walk to the back of the plane and there are ZERO seats. I walk back to the front and inform the attendant and let her know and tell her I am not leaving the plane and will ride with the pilot if I had to and she assures me it will be taken care of. Turns out they let one too many people on and had to remove one of the passengers. Yeah, we're heading to Phoenix.

Next stage. Well we get into Phoenix and pick up our rental car and head to my daughters first game as we already missed my sons first game. It's now about noon and we head to the hotel to see if it's possible to check in and they inform us that our room won't be ready till about 2. We are exhausted so we head across the street to a park where some of the tournament teams are playing thinking we will watch till our room is ready. Well we ended up falling asleep in the park under a tree. We had been up for well over 24 hours. Anyway we wake up, check into the hotel and then head out to my sons second game of the day and later catch my daughters second game. The reason we needed to get there is that we had only purchased a one way ticket for my daughter and she was going to fly back with us on a buddy pass. The tournament was pretty messed up as because of the computer breakdown and cancellation of flights by America West several teams never made it to Phoenix and several others got there late missing their first games. It was quite an adventure but we got their. saw most of the games and made it back home without a glitch.

If you made it through this whole story then congrats, you now know how I felt that day, night and next day.