Your answer here and the way you felt explaining this is probably the exact feeling I get when I try to explain my side of things..Anybody who thought "defund the police" meant people wanted the police to be abolished was a fucking idiot.
The whole point was to cut funding for things that turn police into military occupiers (tanks, assault gear, etc).
Police should be peace officers, who are there to serve and protect.
Rather than funding them to be cowboys who run around fucking the sheep and lying for each other to keep the game going.
There are people who side with something and are 'fucking idiot'.. (mostly extreme people on both sides of an argument).
But once you get into the complexities and see no side as 'pure' right or wrong - than dialogue and improvment can happen..