The racist humor thread

[TradeNurkicNow]

I know the best racist joke ever but I dont want to deal with the shitstorm for posting it

now you have to post it

you have diplomatic immunity

 

[bintim]

I know the best racist joke ever but I dont want to deal with the shitstorm for posting it

I'll post it as long as it doesn't denigrate Norwegian Americans. This thread shouldn't have been opened if those posting on it are going to be offended. It can't be any worse than the raping baby shit that is posted.

 

[maxiep]

An Irishman walked out of a bar.

 

[bintim]

An Irishman walked out of a bar.

That is impossible.

 

[DaRizzle]

Alright....Im gonna do it.....feel free to make a middle eastern joke to even this joke out

Q: Whats the difference between black men and tires?

A: Tires dont sing when you put chains on them


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[Eastoff]

Q: Whats the difference between black men and tires?

A: Tires dont sing when you put chains on them

I've heard much worse. I want to hear some racist jokes about white people!

 

[DaRizzle]

I've heard much worse. I want to hear some racist jokes about white people!

I didnt mean it was worse than anything out there...I thought it was a racist joke that is actually funny...in a fucked up way of course

 

[VanillaGorilla]

I didnt mean it was worse than anything out there...I thought it was a racist joke that is actually funny...in a fucked up way of course

I was in this dude's car that is a friend of a friend and this conversation happened:

Dude: Wanna hear a black person joke?

Me and Mexican friend: Sure

Dude: What do you say when you're sleeping in the dark and you hear something in your house?

Me and Mexican friend: What?

Dude: GET OUT OF MY HOUSE N****R!

Me: What the fuck? That's not even funny you racist fuck.

Dude: Fuck you! Get out of the car.

Me: You're a racist piece of shit! (as me and my friend get out of the car)

We were in a parking lot and my other friends were in a different car so I just got in theirs and told them about it and they were like yeah he's a douche, we don't like when "our friend" invites him places.

 

[Buzz Killington]

yeah, the "floating TV in the dark" version of that is better.

 

[Buzz Killington]

there's also a "batman" one that's funny.

 

[bintim]

I've heard much worse. I want to hear some racist jokes about white people!

I would like that also.......I grew up in North Dakota and only Norwegians were dumb enough to stay there and freeze, so the only white jokes I know are about how dumb Norwegians are. If I am offended, I promise I will suck it up and pretend I'm not.

 

[Buzz Killington]

Why did the Filipino Cross the Road?














Because there was an outlet store on the other side! har har har! (yeah, I made that shit up myself)

 

[Fez Hammersticks]

So, this black guy finally goes to heaven and at the pearly gates they are handing out angel wings...


He was so excited he asked if he's finally an angel, they replied...


No, you're a bat.

 

[MARIS61]

Let's level the playing field a bit:

Q: Why did God create WASPs?
A: Someone has to buy retail!



Q: What do WASPs think Zimbabwe Rhodesia is?
A: A wide receiver for the Houston Oilers.



Q: How can you tell if a WASP is sexually excited?
A: The stiff upper lip.



Q: What's an American WASP's idea of open-mindedness?
A: Dating a Canadian.



Q: What does a little WASP girl want to be when she grows up?
A: "The very best person I possibly can."



Q: What's a WASP's idea of social security?
A: An ancestor on the Mayflower.



Q: Why did the WASP cross the street?
A: To get to the middle of the road.



Q: What happens when four WASPs find themselves in the same room?
A: A dinner party.



Q: What do WASPs think of the Mideast situation?
A: Well, Newport is all right, but EVERYbody goes to the Cape.



Q: How does a WASP propose marriage?
A: "How would you like to be buried with my people?"



Q: What's a WASP's idea of affirmative action?
A: Hiring South American jockeys.



Q: What do WASPs say after sex?
A: "Thank you very much. I'm sorry. It won't happen again.



Q: What's a WASP's definition of conspicuous consumption?
A: A Sunfish with a spinnaker.



Q. What do you call a WASP with a four-inch prick?
A. Well hung.



Q. How can you tell when a WASP is dead?
A. He lets go of his wallet.



Q. What do you call a WASP virgin?
A. You can't. Her number's unlisted.



Q. What's a WASP's favourite song?
A. "I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas."



Q. What does a professional WASP call her boss?
A. Daddy



Q: How many WASPS does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Three. Two to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician.



Q: What is a WASP menage a trois?
A: Two headaches and one hard-on.


Q: Why do WASPs play golf?
A: So they can dress like pimps.
--Andrea Zastrow



Q. What is the definition of a WASP?
A. Someone who gets out of the shower to take a leak.


--seismo!godot.think.com!mincy

 

[Buzz Killington]

So, this black guy finally goes to heaven and at the pearly gates they are handing out angel wings...


He was so excited he asked if he's finally an angel, they replied...


No, you're a bat.

the one I remember was simlar to this, but it involved sticking a bat up the ass and he's "batman".

 

[drexlersdad]

Alright....Im gonna do it.....feel free to make a middle eastern joke to even this joke out

Q: Whats the difference between black men and tires?

A: Tires dont sing when you put chains on them


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.
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eh...

 

[drexlersdad]

not racist, but contains the word "mexican", not always in good taste.

what do you call a mexican with a rubber toe?

roberto

 

[Colonel Ronan]

How to Chinese people name their children?

They throw pots and pans down the stairs.

 

[BlazerWookee]

What's the difference between the American space program and the Chinese space program?

In the Chinese space program, "Tang" is one of the astronauts...

 

[Eastoff]

Q: What do WASPs think Zimbabwe Rhodesia is?
A: A wide receiver for the Houston Oilers.

Q: What's an American WASP's idea of open-mindedness?
A: Dating a Canadian.

Q: What's a WASP's idea of social security?
A: An ancestor on the Mayflower.

Q: What happens when four WASPs find themselves in the same room?
A: A dinner party.

Q: What do WASPs think of the Mideast situation?
A: Well, Newport is all right, but EVERYbody goes to the Cape.

Q: What's a WASP's idea of affirmative action?
A: Hiring South American jockeys.

Q: What do WASPs say after sex?
A: "Thank you very much. I'm sorry. It won't happen again.

Q. What do you call a WASP with a four-inch prick?
A. Well hung.

Q. How can you tell when a WASP is dead?
A. He lets go of his wallet.

Q. What do you call a WASP virgin?
A. You can't. Her number's unlisted.

Q. What does a professional WASP call her boss?
A. Daddy

Q: How many WASPS does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Three. Two to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician.

Q. What is the definition of a WASP?
A. Someone who gets out of the shower to take a leak.

I liked these jokes.

 

[OSUBlazerfan]

There are 5 black people in a Cadilac. They drive off the Grand Cannon. What is sad about this story?













A Cadilac seats 6 black people.

 

[OSUBlazerfan]

Because i believe in racial equality



what do you call a white woman with a yeast infection????









Crakerz with cheese.

 

[OSUBlazerfan]

and also


What did the white guy see when looking at his family tree?













A straight line.

 

[Colonel Ronan]

I understand this is a thread for racist jokes but it's not like the n-bomb was needed to make it "funny" -- If you can even call it that.

 

[BlazerWookee]

John Callahan FTW...

 

[BlazerWookee]

One of my all-time favorites:

 

[maxiep]

Because i believe in racial equality



what do you call a white woman with a yeast infection????









Derek Anderson.

Fixed it for you. BTW, I mean DA our former SG.

 

[speeds]

What do you call a black man who can fly a plane?




A pilot, you racist.

 

[OSUBlazerfan]

Fixed it for you. BTW, I mean DA our former SG.

Haha, sorry cant play, I have a toothache

 

[PtldPlatypus]

What does "Pontiac" stand for?

Poor
Old
N*****
Thinks
It's
A
Cadillac